torn // muke

3

| Luke |

I walked back over to Michael when I was done, and he didn't say anything until I sat down.

"Have fun?" He asked, and I playfully rolled my eyes. "I don't feel good." I whispered, and leaned my head back on the wall. "Yeah. The guys left five minutes ago. I was about to go check on you if you didn't come soon. I just figured you were jacking off or something." He said, and I scoffed. "No. I had to lay down for a second. With two penises being shoved down my throat, it gets a little hard to breathe." I said, and he nodded.

"Let me drive you home." He said, and I looked over at him. "Don't you have a train to catch?" I asked, and he shook his head. I furrowed my eyebrows. "Than why are you here?" I asked.

"I just wanted to talk. I don't know." He said, and stood up, waiting for me. Without any other words, I stood up, walking with him to his car.

-

"Wait- hold on. So you're telling me the guy brought his pet snake, and wanted to..."

"He wanted me to let the snake move around on me while I made sex noises and he jacked off in the corner. That's the strangest thing that's ever happened to me." I said, and he leaned on his arm while he laughed.

"Did you do it?" He laughed, and I nodded and blushed. "It was $900." I whispered, and ate another fry.

Me and Michael made a stop at McDonald's, ordered two large fries and dumped them all out onto the tray, sharing the pile.

"What about you?" I asked, and he thought for a second.

"Well. I picked up a guy off of the streets, and we sat in a McDonald's at 3 in the morning eating a fry mountain." He said, and I rolled my eyes, throwing one at him.

"No. I'm just kidding. The strangest thing. Hmm. Well. My old neighbor wasn't all the way there in the head, and she used to come out in the apartment hallway, and walk her ceramic cats in a plastic wagon. She would just go up and down the hallway for like 30 minutes a day." He said, and I laughed.

I looked up and saw him smiling at me. He pulled his sleeves down over his hands, and crossed them on the table.

"Why did we do this?" I asked, and he shrugged. "I wanted to have fun." He said, and I lightly smiled.

"Why'd you pick me though? I'm sure you have other friends." I said.

"I just moved here. I haven't really gotten around to making friends." He said, and I nodded, followed by a yawn.

I felt my hand start shaking a bit, and I was glad that the tray was empty. "Can we go outside?" I asked, and he nodded. "Are you feeling okay?" He asked, and I nodded, walking quickly.

I got out there, and walked to the other side of the parking lot. I stood in front of Michael's car, and pulled out my cigarettes, lighting one, and immediately feeling calm once it touched my lips.

He sat on the hood, and patted the spot next to him. I sat beside him, and crossed my legs.

"Why do you smoke?" He asked.

"Why do you ask so many questions?"

"Luke." He said, and I sighed.

"I don't know. It just relaxes me. Bad habit." I said, and he took it from my fingers, and held it in his.

"These things are interesting. They can kill you in an instant, but somehow they calm a person down." He said, and handed it back. I'm surprised he didn't put it out this time.

"You're wondering why I didn't put it out, yeah?" He asked, and I looked up at him. Am I that readable?

"You're pretty predictable. Or maybe I'm just good at reading people. But, I know how much you think you need it."

I felt something inside of my chest, and I didn't know if I liked it or not. It only happened when Michael said something.
I told myself I wasn't gonna like guys anymore. Or girls. I was just gonna use them for money. I wouldn't actually like one.

It's so confusing why Michael actually wants to be my friend. He hasn't asked for anything. He doesn't want sex, but that's all I'm good for.

I've only talked to Michael for two nights, but part of me is saying I want him to stay in my life, but the other part is telling me to push him away because I just don't fall in love.

I looked back up at Michael, and then put the cigarette out beneath my feet.

For now, I'm gonna listen to the part telling me to keep him around.