Is It Dangerous or Just Stupid?

Chapter 10

Emi returns home safely and without getting into a fight. The moment she walks inside, someone jumps onto her making her tumble back a bit, "Eep! Kamui can't you be a bit gentle?" "Where the hell were you?! You disappeared and then you never came back." Emi tilts her head, "Wait were you worried about me?" Kamui looks her in the eyes and nods his head, "Of course I was worried! Who the hell is going to make me delicious food!" ~THATS WHY HE WAS WORRIED!! What an idiot!~ Emi knees him in the stomach. ~I can't feel bad about this fight! I'm home, so that promise doesn't affect me anymore.~ She prepares herself for Kamui's hit but it never comes. He lays on the ground clutching his stomach. Emi kneels down and shakes Kamui a little, "Kamui? Come on get up, I didn't hit you that hard.." She shakes him a bit more roughly, "Kamui stop acting like a baby!" That's when their positions switched and he was now hovering over her, "Hahaha got you! You should never let your guard down around a predator. You never know when it will attack." Emi's eyes widen as she pushes her hands against his face, "Idiot! I was worried that I hit you too hard! Don't pull a stunt like that again!" "Okay okay, I promise not to do that again..at least today..." "What was that?" "Nothing!" She stares at him skeptically and sighs, "Get off me, I'll make us some tea." Kamui doesn't move instead he touches the bandage on her head, "Does it hurt?" "Hm? Oh it doesn't hurt that bad anymore. Just got a little headache still." Kamui puts his forehead against hers, "I'm sorry. You can get payback on me." "I can't do that!" "Why not?" "Sure it was your fault that I got hurt but we were just having some fun. There was no way you could've known that was going to happen." "That doesn't excuse what I did to you..." Emi places her hands on his cheeks, "Don't worry about it.. It could've happened to anyone." "Is that so?" "Yeah..." "It's a shame though, you had a chance to deal me some heavy damage.." "I don't need it.." "That so?" Emi nods her head, Kamui slowly brings his face closer. Inches away before their lips met, there was a knock on the door. Emi pushes Kamui off and peeks out the window. She sees Hijikata and Kondo. ~Wha!! What are these two doing here?! Crap I need to hide Kamui quickly!~ "Quick Kamui, hide in the bathroom!" "What why?" "Just do it and I'll make you extra servings tonight." "You said the right words!" Kamui goes to the bathroom and shuts the door behind him. Emi answers the door with a smile on her face, "Isao-Chan! Hijikata! What a nice surprise!" Emi is quickly wrapped in Kondo's arms, "Emi-Chan!!!! Are you okay?!" "Yes I'm fine... Why wouldn't I be?" "Sougo told us the whole story!!" ~That bastard!!! Oh he's going to get it the next time I see him!~ Kondo carries her inside and Hijikata follows, closing the door behind him. "I see this place is as small as always." "Well sorry it isn't as big and luxurious as the Shinsengumi Headquarters. At least it is up to code and clean unlike that place you call a bathroom." Hijikata meanly smiles, "You know you could live with us." "I couldn't do that! I've bothered you all way too much for an entire 5 years!" Kondo cries and rubs his cheek against hers, "It's not a bother at all!! Come live with us, we'll have lots of fun!" "I'm afraid of the food situation.." "We have plenty of food for everyone!" Emi looks at Hijikata and grimaces, "That's not what I'm afraid of..." "What the hell is that look for?!" "I can already tell I'm going to have nightmares.." Hijikata snatches her from Kondo's arms and starts furiously shaking her, "What! What are you going to have nightmares about!? Don't make the mayonnaise cry! I'll have you commit sepukku for it!!" Emi puts a hand to her cheek and shakes her head, "Oh no, I'll have to commit sepukku for making the mayonnaise cry... I'm such a horrible person. Perhaps Okita will help me make the mayonnaise cry?" "Both of you will commit sepukku!!" "Now now Toshi, we can't kill them because the mayonnaise cried. It's fair because the mayonnaise made me cry!" "Awwww Toshi that's soo mean. Why did you let the mayonnaise hurt poor Isao-Chan." Hijikata shakes her a little more, "Who said you could call me Toshi!" Emi wraps her legs around his waist and takes him down. She sits atop of him, gloating with victory. "You two be careful! We don't need Emi getting hurt again and we don't need Toshi getting hurt either." Emi stands up and points at Hijikata, "He started it!" He points back, "She started it! But now that we are on the subject of food, Yamazaki told me to tell you that anpan and milk is the best diet for a spy so it isn't an awful diet. I have no idea why he would want me to tell you that." "Ah yes, his horrible diet. But we came to a conclusion that your diet was worse." "How is my diet worse!" "Hijikata how are you still alive after eating that much mayonnaise in your entire life." "Toshi is molded by mayonnaise. The way he eats it has become a way to make him immortal." "Oh wow! Maybe I can find something to make me immortal!" Kondo looks at her and shakes his head, "Please don't.. I don't need you to go into some kind of cardiac arrest." "Cardiac arrest? Nah I can totally avoid that!" Kondo grabs her head and squeezes it a little, "No no! There will be no cardiac arrest!" "Ow ow ow ow!!! Isao-Chan, you're squeezing my head wound!!" "Say it! No cardiac arrest for you!" "Ow ow ow ow!! Alright, no cardiac arrest for me!" "Pledge to it!" "Ow!! Okay! I, Rumi Emiko, promise not to go into cardiac arrest!!" "Aaannnddd!!" "And I'm sorry for worrying my Shinsengumi family!" Hijikata stands up and crosses his arms, "Annnd?" "I'm sorry I called Gintoki first!" Kondo releases her head and laughs, "That's good. I'm sorry I probably opened up your stitches." "No, not at all." A single tear runs down her cheek. Hijikata wipes away the tear with the back of his hand, "Why are you crying, brat?" "I'm really blessed to have a family like you guys.." Hijikata sighs and wraps his arm around her head, bringer her closer to him. "Idiot don't cry over such things. You should always show us that goofy smile of yours." Kondo nods his head in agreement. Emi wraps her arms around Hijikata and bites him, "AGH! What the hell!?" "Kukuku!! Don't let your guard down around a predator!" Hijikata clenches his fist and ties her up. He tosses her onto the futon and lights his cigarette, "Kondo-San lets get going." "Shouldn't we untie her?!" "She'll wiggle her way out soon. Let's go!" Hijikata and Kondo leave. "Come back here and untie me!!! You Mayonnaise Bastard!"