Turn Back Time -s.m

seven

1 January 2012//Pickering , Toronto

Your House-9th grade

17.55 p.m

You

it's the first day of new year and life is going extremely not amazing . i've cried for 10 hours non stop , cutting myself , not attending my family's new  year event . shut myself out . 

why is this happening to me ? why me? why not anyone else. i'm currently 15 and things are just hard for me too handle . relationships are supposed to be wonderful just like what they said. but mines was broken . it was white and now it's black.

i broke up with ex boyfriend yesterday , it was tragic. i saw him doing couple things in the mall with a girl i don't know and i don't want to know. she's way better than me . i should've listen to shawn that he's bad for me . 

i lock myself in the bathroom , my mom had been begging me not to do this. but i can't help it , this is my only escape . my only way to relieve my stress.

"(y/n)? are you in there?" a voice asks . probably shawn "who's that?" i ask "it's me. shawn" he says .i wipe my tears " what are you doing here?" i ask from inside the bathroom . " i'm here to talk and i bring movies" he says " it's not the time for jokes and movies shawn " i said , rudely .

"please (y/n) , i know you're sad and hurt right now and i'm not those movie guys who keeps waiting and waiting for you to come out." he says . maybe i should talk , maybe hurting myself isn't a way to solve my problems .

i unlock the door and there he is standing there , being taller than me since puberty hits him like a rocket. i can't handle the tears and i hug him . "shh , babygirl." he says " wait why are you calling me babygirl?" i ask . he never called me babygirl . he doesn't answer instead he hugs me even tighter .

i love shawn's hugs , they're warm and cozy , relieving . " do you want to talk about it?" he asks " not really." " i know it's hard , and i told you-" i cut him off. " yeah yeah , he's not good for me and he's going to break my heart." 

shawn is a good guy . he can make me laugh when i'm down , he brings me flowers when i'm feeling sad . he's the bestest friend , if that's english . i don't know why are we not together but i love now . i love our friendship, it's unbeatable. 

" this new year is the worst new year , but who cares ? we have each other." i said , screaming a bit . " so you're not going to cut again right?" he asks " of course , i'm going to count the days i'm clean , and you boy? do you cut?" i asked . he stayed silent " shawn? did you?" i asked . he turns his head away . i look at his wrist ." shawn? why? you warned me to stop " i asked 

" it's only because i can't get the girl i want . she's too perfect for me ." he says " shawn, no . you're going to find a girl that can understand you . love you for who you are." i said " but she's inlove with someone else." he says ."you'll find someone better eventually." i said 

" hey and did you know that someone has a crush on you? she said puberty hits you hard , you went from little mama boy to gurl i'm gonna eat you. " i change the topic while laughing " what? who?" he asks 

"jolyne. " i said " oh really?" he asks while smirking ." yes , i'm not kidding . puberty hits you good , boy . i was like taller than you and now you crazy ass 10 cm away from me.hahaha" i said " oh yeah? so i'm attractive ?" he asks " for jolyne yes , for me ? um- let me think." i pretend thinking " too long , that means yes." he says , standing up .

" whatever." i roll my eyes. he tries to cheer me up but i keep pretending to ignore "i give up ," he says hands down . "HAHA !" i yelled " you smiled! i win" he says "no you don't " i said .

we're pillow fighting when he sees the clock and it's 11 p.m "i have to go home .it's 11 already." he says "ugh , why can't you sleepover? your mom knows we're friends she -" once more he cut me off "uh-oh go sleep , i have something to tell you tomorrow , very very important ." he says in a serious tone " okay , and don't give me that serious look please." i said 

i walk him to the porch " bye (y/n) " shawn says kissing my cheek " aww shon " i said.what does he want to tell ? he has never been this serious . is it about him and lauren? i should be mentally ready for anything that's going to happen.

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NOTES

Vote and comment any wrong english .