Gay Is the Way [BoyxBoy]

Chapter 22 - Over For Now

My heart felt like I wanted to puke and disintegrate. My hands began to shake and I got a piercing pain in the pit of my stomach. I couldn't send a message to my limbs to move because thats how drastic I felt.

I felt someone tapping, nudging, and whispering to me but I couldn't listen to them. I thought I saw my life flash before my eyes and all the events that I have ever experienced up to this point became instant memories. My body felt exposed, lost, and dead. I look around my surroundings and see nothing but trees and a big figure next to me.

I flinched and jumped into James' arms when I came into my senses. "Baby its only me." He whispered.

I looked up over my shoulder and smiled a little. That didn't help his expression because he was having a panic attack.

"This shit ain't good yo. Someone saw us." James began pacing around a tree with his eyes staring in his palms. "No, no, no..." James kept repeating it over and over and over again. Each 'no' got worse with his voice getting rasper and deeper. He had every right to feel that way and so did I.

"James its.."

"Please don't say its going to be ok because that wont help." I felt a throbbing ache in my chest and with each pump of blood my body grew colder and numb. I've never felt like this before. I feel like my life is over. I feel like it was all over.

"Dammit man. I didn't even get a chance to see what the fucker looked like. It could've been anyone." He cursed with great force. There is no telling what this could all lead to.

James seemed to have the wishful thinking out the door because he was borderline freaking out. James' discreetness means so much to him and if that somehow got out then chaos would strike. "Oh man. No, no, no...this shit can't be happening." He cursed loudly. He used a tree to lower his body until he sat in a patch of moss and leaves. All of a sudden he seemed so broken, vulnerable and scared. This worried me even more because I never seem this side of him or at least his fearful side.

"James please calm down. Your starting to scare me." I grabbed his fingers to give him comfort. Deep down it brought me more comfort than anything else. He shot his eyes through me and a sensed a sensation in my chest to where he looked. His stare was kinda cold but it searched for stability.

"I'm so sorry. This is my fault. I shouldn't have brought you out here." He shook his head and started shaking. He just couldn't stop shaking.

"Its not your fault." I palmed his cheek and he squeezed my hand in return. That is one of the best feelings in the world. Even at times like this, the way he never lets go amazes me. "James please calm down." His hazel eyes couldn't keep quiet in the moment but he managed to settle down.

"Come on, we gotta get back." He said full of integrity. It was weird for him to say it the way he did but that was the least of my worries. What I wanted was to leave because I couldn't stand another moment out here.

"Ok"

We grabbed all of the wood and headed back to the cabin. I was so confused so I followed James since only he knew where to go. My mind was racing with itself and being the person I am I was already staring into the future. I hate that I think too much but I can't help it.

Someone saw us. And the more I think about the more sick and scared I become.

I begin to whimper from the hollow feeling I felt inside. James grabbed my hand for a split second but then let go. "Try not to think about ok." He murmured.

"James..." I whined out before he stopped me.

"Please no more talking about it baby."

Soon we reached the cabin and found Devon outside the door leading into the back way. "What took you so long?" He looked at me carrying some wood and then back at James. "And did he go to? It should've been quicker don't you think." Devon raises his eyebrows like he wanted an immediate answer. James started to stammer and stumble with his words, which made me nervous.