Diary of a Teenage Girl (Complete)

7.5 - Wait.. Im feeling what?

So many weeks had passed. The battle of the bands is three days away. I'm so nervous but since then we were practicing for it. We are so grateful to Sabrina and Jeremy's dad he let us use the space of his exercise room to be out studio. Uhm what else is new? Santana and Jeremy is an item. We've been practicing all day and at last Sabrina decided that we are now finished practicing. And she also decided to have a slumber party tonight. Jan said he had something to do so he wouldn't come. Santana phoned her mother which I think she has been permitted to stay. Sabrina said she'd ask my mom if I can stay in their house tonight, which I think even if I said I'm gonna stay at Sab's forever she wouldn't disagree. So we went to my house to find out mom wasn't home, but there was dad. Sabrina asked my dad instead and they were joking about a grandchild. I was a little embarrassed, Why did my dad said that all of the sudden. Then Sabrina just told my dad she won't let me lay a hand on her. I told Sabrina that I'll get pajamas so she went with me into my room. She said something about my parents liking her. I told her she had no idea. You know my parents really love her. And since we reached high school they've been pestering me to court Sabrina. Sabrina told me that her parents are fond of me too. I just said I know and I smiled. Is that enough to court her? Maybe. Because her parents approve of me. But I shouldn't. I put everything I need in the bag. Sabrina just told me she wanted to try something. She was standing on my bed. I think she would dive or do a back-flip but she told me to come over there. So I did. I walked slowly; I was thinking what she might do. Does she want to jump from the bed to me? I didn't let my guard down. I was prepared for whatever Sabrina was thinking doing. But I was in front of her now but she hasn't moved an inch. She held my face. Examine it for a while and next thing I knew she kissed me on the forehead and my nose. Oh my ghad. What is Sabrina doing? Erase the thing I said I was prepared for anything. I was prepared for some stunts this girl would be doing but not this. What is she planning? Is this some kind of a game again? I was talking when she kissed me on the lips. My heart leaped. I think my soul just left my body. But I said to myself 'Hold it Amiel. This is what you've been waiting for. Hold her'. So I held her. Next thing she did was jump on me. But we were still kissing. It's like a scene in a movie. Well that's what I think. Seconds later our lips parted. I saw a smile on her and I smiled. Okay I was back. I wanted to asked her what were she thinking but she cut my sentence and said she wanted to try something. So that was only an experiment? Is this girl is just playing with my feelings? But wait she doesn't even know I have feelings for her. She said she was sorry for crossing the line but she wanted to do that and she trusted me. I was speechless. But I heard she said it was perfect just like what she imagined. Okay this was on her mind all the time? Does she? No I think not. Maybe I'm just the one imagining things. She thanked me for giving her her first kiss. Then we went back on their pad to see Jeremy and Santana kissing on the bed. And Jeremy just announced that they are together now. Wow. That's my boy Jeremy. Sabrina ordered a pizza for the occasion and Jeremy put on a horror movie on the player. Sabrina was scared of it so she was covering her face with a pillow. Then to our surprise, Mrs. B. popped out of the balcony to hand us our pizza. We were all scared. We ate the pizza then continued to watch the movie. When I heard Sabrina sobbing I wrapped my arms around her. And occasionally hugged her each time she flinched. I told her I'm there so she should not worry about it and kissed her forehead. She touched my lips, I thought I would get another of her experimental kisses but no she just leaned on my chest and hugged me. Mrs. B popped out again and reminding us were should we sleep. Jeremy protested a bit. He wanted to sleep with Santana tonight. Ha-ha poor him. Then when the movie was over, we decided to sleep. So we got ready to go to sleep. Sabrina and I were the first to use the bathroom. I swear Sabrina wanted to say something to me but she can't. What would that be? We talked about Santana and Jeremy being together and she asked when does her comes. I wanted to tell her it was me but I just told her that time would come. Santana and Jeremy were the next to use the bathroom. After sometime they came back in the room and we said goodnight to each other. Sabrina hugged me and kissed me on my cheeks. My night was great. I would never ask for more.

That night Jeremy and I had a man-to-man conversation. I was the one who started it. "Hey Jer, I have something to tell you, would it be okay if I just tell something to you?"

"No problem dude, you are like my brother" he answered.

"Uhm, this might of shock you but i.." I hesitated at first but I got all the guts I could to tell her brother I love her "uhm Jeremy, what if..What if I love your sister?"

"Uhm bro, I think it's not of a big deal for me. From the start we wanted you for her"

My heart beat so fast. "I will say this only to you Jeremy. And promise not to tell her I told you. But earlier when we were at my room, she said she wanted to try something and she kissed me. Jeremy what does that mean?"

"It means my sister like you, stupid"

"You think so? You know you're making my hopes ups. But I can't. No, I mean I don't know how to express how I really feel. We've known each other since birth and I just can't picture us together. What should I do Jer?"

"You know, you were the one who said that you've known each other since birth. Shouldn't it easy saying how you feel with her? Amiel, You should do it before someone might get her from you."

"Well I know, it's just what if she doesn't like me, what if she will hate me for doing it? What if it's just my imagination kicking?"

"You're so scared Amiel, I know that feeling, but you'll never know the answer if you don't try risking something. You might live your life full of regrets, so try it and everything will follow. I'm sure everything is gonna be all right."

"Thanks Jer. I appreciate it. I will try it but not now. I'll just save all my guts for this."

"You're welcome Amiel, anytime"

We talked about lot of things too. We were enjoying ourselves talking that to our surprise when we looked at the clock it's almost 3am so we decided to sleep.