Dear Diary

Chapter 8

Date number two.
This time the date planned by Emma.

I was extremely nervous. I don't know why. Possibly because I've been coming to the realization that I'm sort of already crazy about this woman.

It's pretty strange.

I haven't dated in a very long time and then here comes this person. This woman, who just swoops in with her charm and her beauty and sweeps me off my feet. Unintentionally of course but nonetheless.

Emma picked me up and I was surprised to find her on time since time wasn't necessarily one of her strong suits.

I heard a knock on the door a 7 o'clock. I was ready of course. I'd been ready since 6:30 just in case. When I opened the door my mouth became dry because Emma looked beautiful. I don't think I've ever seen her out of jeans.

I watched her squirm a little under my gaze and I could tell she was uncomfortable. I didn't know that I could make her feel like that. I raised an eyebrow because I'd found my new challenge. I liked seeing her squirm.

"Emma, you look beautiful." I said. Emma reached her hand forward to grab my hand in hers. I smiled as she pulled me outside. I slammed the door behind me. She smiled awkwardly.

She looked as though she were afraid. The only thing I wanted to do in the moment was pull her into my arms and hold her close. I wanted to protect her. I'd give anything for her to let me protect her.

"Sorry. I didn't mean to pull you like that." She shrugged. I chuckled a little. "I understand your excitement. What's the plan for tonight?"

"Oh you'll see." She smiled once again and dragged me along to the car.

The drive to the restaurant took us about 30 minutes. I'd never seen it before. I didn't really spend much time out of Storybrooke. But when I did see it, I was filled with excitement.

It was absolutely stunning. It had lights around the outside but not in a tacky way. They looked beautiful. The inside of the restaurant was dimly lit and soft music played in the background. There were many empty tables for the small business but it made it even more romantic.

I don't know what I was expecting but I don't think it was this.

I took her bowling on our first date for crying it loud. She'd really out done herself.

I knew we were in for an amazing night together.

"So do you like it?" Emma asked shyly as we sat down at the table. "Oh my, I love it. I've never even heard of this place but it's absolutely gorgeous." I said reaching my hand out to lie on top of hers.

"I'm really glad you like it. This place is very small but it's incredible. Plus we don't have to worry about being disturbed. We can sit here all night if we want to."

Her smile in that moment made my cold heart feel things that I didn't know was possible for me. Her eyes lit up the dark room and I wanted so badly to kiss her.

I didn't kiss her though. That we would save for later.

We ate slowly. There was no need to rush. We were content with each other's company and I believe neither of us wanted it to end.

"So you read a lot? I never would've guessed it." I questioned her.

"I'm not sure whether or not I should take offense to that but yes I love to read. More often than not you'll find me with my face in a book." Emma answered.

"I did not mean it to be offensive dear. What do you like to read?"

Her hand found my arm. She rubbed her thumb against my skin to assure me that she wasn't offended but she pulled away too quickly.

"I'll read anything pretty much. If I read the back of a book and it catches my attention I'll read it. I love poetry. Oscar Wilde, Edgar Allen Poe, Silvia Plath. I like the dark stuff."

I raised an eyebrow and she continued.

"The darkness just makes it so much more real. That's why it's so interesting. Darkness is terrifying. It's scary to think that you could possibly be in a place where you're unsure that you'll ever escape. Some people do and some people don't. But it's such a real possibility." She paused to find a reaction but continued. "I don't know if that makes sense. I'm not
very good at explaining things."

"I get it. Darkness is alluring. You don't want to be there but you also have this side of you that wants to explore it."

Emma's eyes lit up. "That's exactly it. I went through a shitty childhood and there were times where I wasn't sure it would ever get better. I mean it did so I'm incredibly grateful but some people don't have the luxury. I like to read about the stuff that makes me realize how lucky I am in certain aspects."

I knew how she felt too. I didn't exactly have a perfect childhood. It wasn't like Emma's though. I had a family. It may not have been the best one but I always had food and a roof over my head.

For the longest time, I was so depressed because I hated that so much. I hated the fact that my mother was so hard on me. My father was too afraid to stand up to her so I resented him too. But it could've been a lot worse and look at me now.

"Can I tell you something and you promise me you won't run away?"

Emma nodded. "I won't run away."

I took a deep breath before admitting what had been sitting on my lungs. "I really like you. I don't know how or when it happened but everyday I'm beginning to like you more and more."

There was something in Emma's eyes that I couldn't quite figure out. I didn't know how to decipher that look.

"I really like you too Regina. I don't know what else to say but I do really like you."

She admitted her feelings but that look stayed in her eyes.

We left the restaurant hand in hand. I wasn't ashamed either. I knew there was a possibility of seeing someone we knew but I didn't mind. I was happy and nothing could stop it now.

Our hand broke just for us to get into the car but they crawled back to each other over the center console.

Emma's thumb rubbed circles on the back of my hand the whole ride home. I couldn't stop looking at her. I tried to hide my staring but I know she's caught me a few times.

We sat in the driveway for several minutes before speaking.

"Is it wrong that I don't want you to leave?" I asked her. I kept my eyes fixed on my house in front of us to afraid to see what her reaction may be.

"I don't want to leave." She said quietly.

I turned my focus to her. That's when we both slowly leaned in for a kiss.