Thoughts

I Can't Hate You

You want to know a secret?
I don't hate you.
God.
I don't hate you at all.
And I hate that.
I hate your smile.
And the way your squint when you laugh.
I hate how when you're confused
Your eyebrows crease
And you look so damn cute.
I hate that you brush your hair out of your eyes
And you smile at the floor when you're shy
Or embarrassed.
I hate how I've noticed all of this.
How I've learned to tell your moods
Through facial expression
And through a change in text.
And I hate
How you notice nothing about me.
How talking to you makes me happy
But for you seems to be pulling teeth.
How you make me okay
And I only seem to get in your way.
And I hate
God do I hate
How most of those were lies.
I hate
How I can't hate anything about you.
So I'll just settle
For hating myself.