The World Is Ugly But You're Beautiful To Me

Don't Fuck Around

"Frank!" Gerard yelled as he hit him over and over again "stop!"
I had to stop him I ran up to them and slid down on the grass in front of Gerard and Frank immediately stopped hitting him.
"What are you doing?" he asked
"Stopping you from hurting him," I said as tears built up more and more in my eyes, he looked at me intensely before picking me up and hugging me.
"You are so fucking lucky she stopped me," Frank spoke with anger in his voice
"I know that," Gerard wiped his nose and sat up while Frank wiped away my tears.
"I am so sorry," Frank tried not to cry as he hugged me I turned to Gerard.
"You know what Gerard? Be an alcoholic you're only hurting yourself and everyone who loves you... You're only hurting me and Frank and Ray and have you even thought about Mikey? But no because you want to drink and feel your organs give out, so go ahead like I said your only hurting everyone who loves you," I let tears fall from my eyes as Gerard stared at me.
"And Frank I love you okay stop saying sorry you done shitty things and apologised for them, and I forgave you so stop okay, I love you," I kissed him.
"I know I just don't think it's enough-" he started
"Don't say that Frank I love you and if you love me then that's enough for me," I moved his hair out of his face a bit before he kissed me on the head.
"I love you, E," he whispered in my ear.
"I love you too, Iero," he kissed me and I felt him smile as it happened.
"Okay..." Gerard looks away obviously upset and I pulled away knowing I didn't want to hurt him even if he had said some shit to me.
"Listen to me, E," Gerard started "I'm sorry for drinking honestly it was because of what happened you wouldn't let me explain it," he looked at me while standing up and I instantly knew he wasn't lying even before he had started talking about it "Su made me she threatened me and I was scared, she said she would kill herself and I was too afraid to say no I wasn't allowed to tell you and if I did she would kill herself straight away so you would be pissed at me," he said in one breath.
"Gerard..." I looked at him and Frank's arms dropped from my waist to his side.
"No eh I get it if you don't believe me...I mean I'm drunk and I hurt you and I done all that shit so," he finished and I realised something, him and Frank had done he same sort of shit and it did sound like something Su would do... How did I react I had an option that I wasn't willing to make.
"I...believe you Gee," I spoke quietly as I knew Frank would be upset even though he knew I loved him, but I loved Gee and Frank I just didn't know how to say that I loved one over the other because that's a horrible thing to say to someone.
"You do?" He asked and I nodded as he ran up and hugged me, I hugged him back and it fell right but it felt right with Frank as well.
"Wait so who are you with?" Frank broke the silence with the question I dreaded to answer.
"I...eh," I saw both of them look upset and felt my heart break just a little.
"You don't know?" Gerard asked innocently
"Mh hmm," I agreed he was right.
"Okay well that's perfect!" Frank said impatiently, I knew they loved me but I didn't know how to break it to them.
"Frank-" he interrupted
"Ella?" Frank looked at me, why did he call me Ella and not E or El like he normally done?
"Why did you call me Ella?" I asked miming my thoughts
"What do you mean?" He asked staring at me
"I mean you normally call me E or El but you interrupted me and called me Ella all seriously," I looked at him afraid of the answer.
"Listen Ella, you don't need to date me I get it sleeping with me was a mistake I was drunk and you were mad and that's not a good mix,"
"Frank, it wasn't- I didn't- what do you- ugh!" I sat down in frustration. "It wasn't a mistake okay?" I started as put my head in my hands "I mean I love you and I love your too Gerard but I- I can only date one of you so someone is going to be angry or upset and I can't deal with that!" I yelled as I brought my knees to my chest "and I love you guys I do and I don't want you to get hurt but- I know someone will get hurt and someone won't want to be friends with us and- I can't deal with that!" I carried on
"Listen, E you don't have to pick right now," Gerard said sitting down beside me and hugging me.
"Th-thanks," I stuttered as tears dropped from my eyes. Gerard wiped them away as I hugged him.
"I'm sorry for saying that," he held me closer to his chest as I cried he stroked my hair softly.
"N-no it's o-kay," I shook as Gerard calmed  me down.
"Call me when you get your mind sorted out," Frank walked away making my heart break slightly at his choice of words.
"It's okay, E," Gerard shushed me which made me stop crying I was just letting out little sobs still shaken up about it.
"Gerard?" I let him hug me and I realised I had to tell him who I wanted to be with.
"What is it sweetie?" He stroked my hair
"I-I want to be with you." I let my tears fall as he became shocked "b-but I d-don't want to fall out w-with F-Frank," he hugged me again and reassured me.
"I promise it'll be alright," he smiled trying to calm me, before I knew it we were kissing in the rain like in one of those a movies like the notebook or Bridget Jones' diary...but better a million times better than the movies, because this was actual love.

I am in love with Gerard Way and he loves me too he actually loves me back.