papercut.

e l e v e n

"Sage I need help." I say, before my sister can even get out a greeting.
"With what?"
"I'm going out on an actual like, official, date with Connor. And I don't know what to do or wear or...say!" Sage lets out a chuckle on the phone.
"Oh Tokkie, you'll be fine! I mean you've already made it past third base with him he obviously likes you."

I roll my eyes and exhale out loud.
"Thanks way to remind me I'm going on a date with the person I had an affair with." Her tone changes.
"No problem big bro. Alright so what're you two doing?" She asks with a hint at the end of her voice. While talking to Sage I walk to the closet and look at my clothes I have on the shelves and hanging up.

"Well we're going to some fancy restaurant and then who knows," I say and instantly regret my word choice, "Besides sex. We've already done that twice we don't need a third time."
"YOU'VE HAD SEX WITH HIM TWICE?" Sage screeches over the phone and I feel myself blushing despite her not being able to see me.
"Remember what I said Sagey, Mum and Dad will never know about this." I assure her and continue to look at outfits I could wear.

Finally with the help of Sage I put on my black skinny jeans and a black dress shirt with small white drawings lacing over it. The shirt buttons up and I do so all the way up to my neck. She insists I put on cologne, just enough and not too much, and put extra sea salt spray in my hair to keep the curls tight. To keep a casual, yet put-together nice outfit, Sage tells me to put on my Converse. I mean, they are a pretty accurate representation of me in the first place; why try to be someone I'm not?

As soon as I hang up with my sister, there's a knock on my bedroom door and I look up right as Connor walks in. He has on a white button up shirt with black buttons going all the way up. Like me, he wears black skinny jeans and over his shirt he wears a black leather style jacket. Holy shit he looks hot. A smile is on his face as he eyes me up and down, starting at my feet and working his way up until he looks me in the eyes and I stand up from where I sit on the edge of my bed.

"You ready?" Connor asks and I nod, trying not to seem to eager.
"Yeah," My voice comes out hitched, still stuck on wondering how lucky I am to have Connor. I reach down and grab my phone, "Let's go."
Together the two of us set out walking to the restaurant we both agreed on. It's known for Thai food and also for it's very romantic setting.

Not even half way there, Connor reaches down and grabs a hold of my hand, lacing our fingers together so they're clasped tightly. My heart flutters in my chest. I'm like a giddy school girl who has a crush on someone, and Connor happens to be my crush. I look over at Connor to see that he's already looking at me and I smile at him, giving his hand a light squeeze at the same time. We take long strides, our hands swinging between our bodies, and our shadows cast on the ground grow longer as it gets later.

We reach the restaurant and get seated, considering we had a reservation for two already. The hostess seats us at a table set for two with a candlelit lantern hanging above us. The lantern provides light, an orange glow set over the table. Seeing the other lanterns hanging makes the restaurant seem to go on forever, though we both know this intimate restaurant is merely the size of a Starbucks.

Talking quietly, we look over the menu and place our orders. I take sips of my cocktail between conversations until our food arrives. The food is delicious; and expensive. When the check comes at the end of the night Connor and I both argue over who's going to pay and finally he just gives the waiter his card and looks at me with a smile. We leave the restaurant how we walked in, hand-in-hand. Connor leads me down the street and to an unfamiliar part of town that I've never been in.

In the dark, everything looks as though it is cloaked in a white, milky moonlight. I see trees and an open stretch of grass. Connor pulls me by my hand to the grassy expanse and we sit down beside each other with the sides of our thighs touching. We're close enough to the city that it is hard to see many stars above us, but since Connor is holding me I don't need the stars. I just need to feel his heartbeat in my ear.

Considering the late time, nobody else is in the park with us. It's just the two of us, laying with each other feeling the grass tickling our necks.
"Probably should've brought a blanket, but I guess this was kinda spur of the moment." Connor jokes, talking in a low voice. His breath hits my skin, despite it's warmth creating goosebumps at the sensation.

"As much as I love LA, I really wish we could see the stars." I say and I feel Connor nod.
"The stars in Minnesota are beautiful. There's so many. You can see the planets and shooting stars and the Milky Way. Maybe I'll take you to see them sometime."
"My family and I used to drive to the beach late at night when there was supposed to be a meteor shower. It was great." I look up at Connor from where my head rests on his chest and he rubs his hand up and down on my back.

"I want to meet them." Connor says to me suddenly and my face changes to one of confusion.
"I want to meet your parents," He repeats, "And I also want time to slow down so I can remember this night forever. I want to remember how beautiful you are right in this moment. And I want to turn back time to make you mine sooner. I want you to always be happy and to look back on life and at all the memories and just smile." My heart swells up as Connor talks, his voice still low but filled with power. The next words that leave his mouth make my heart skip a beat.

"And Troye Sivan Mellet I want you to be my boyfriend."

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THERE'S ONLY ONE MORE CHAPTER BE READY.

I'm seeing Broods in two days and honestly I'm gonna sob so much :') but my summer break ends in 18 days and my goal is to write as much as humanly possible until then to make it easier on me. I'm taking German too so I'm really excited for that.
xx, madi