Dear Hope [UNDER EDITTING]

Letter one [EDITTING]

Dear Anxiety,

I know you know I start a new school tomorrow. That's why you're here, isn't it? I wish you weren't, you make my stomach feel sore. The butterflies hurt a lot.

You make me feel so scared of just people. I mean, I guess I don't know what they will say to me or think of me. But I still wish you would not bother me.

I do need to focus on other more important issues, such as memorising my timetable so I may be punctual at all times and not be the odd one out or what I will say should the teacher call upon me to introduce myself (which I hope she or he doesn't), and even how I should go about making worthwhile friends.

But, no. Of course, you choose to visit and steer my focus from useful and necessary thoughts and instead focus on the stereotypical 'will I fit in' sort of thoughts. I really don't appreciate it, as I'm sure you can probably tell. I'm sorry if you take any offence to this, but I'm sure you get this a lot. Poor you, I suppose.

So, what shall I do about you, hmm? How should I rid myself of you? It really is hard to think of anything when you keep pestering me. Maybe I should just go to sleep. Will you continue to haunt me in my dreams, Anxiety? I hope not.

I returned my library book yesterday so that I could have an excuse to go to this new school's library. I suppose I still would go regardless of having returned the book or not though. And yet again, you make me worried about whether the library will be any good, and whether it is considered 'bully worthy' for me to be absolutely in love with reading, but not very good at maths or wear huge Harry Potter  glasses.

I really wish I would stop talking to you, Anxiety. You always manage to manipulate my thoughts. I just wish for once you would give me hope. I guess that is Hope's job, but it would be nice if Hope wasn't the only one.

Okay, I've finally decided that talking to you is doing me more harm than good. I'm off to bed now, don't you dare follow me into my sleepy mind. Tomorrow is a new day. A new day without you, Anxiety. Have fun outside of my mind.

Sincerely,

Sleepy girl