Candle stick boyz

No going back

Maddie's pov..

I woke up with hangover again. I looked over at the other side of the bed to see my latest hook up buddy.

I moved him so he could wake up. He groaned and turned over to face me.

"Yes?"he asked.

I got up and put on an over sized t-shirt.

"Leave."I replied walking into the bathroom. When I came back out he was gone.

I was about to go back to bed when the door opened.

Jacob walked in and looked at me.

"Saw your latest bed buddy."He announced.

"Cool."I bluntly replied.

"Why, why are you doing this?"Jacob asked.

"Because I can."I replied. He pulled me closer to him.

"No. I'm not letting you do this."he said looking at me.

"Your just mad because it wasn't you."I said getting closer.

"It's doesn't matter your not doing this period."he replied moving away.

"I don't know why you don't want me to do this?!"I yelled out looking at Jacob.

"Why? Are you seriously asking that?"he yelled back.

"What happened to the girl I knew the girl who wanted to get away from this stuff?"Jacob asked looking at me.

"She died when that bomb exploded. And her brother landed in the ICU where he's still there now where he is in a coma and has been for the past three months and her boyfriend is currently missing or worse...dead."I replied looking at him.

"I won't let you do this."Jacob said holding my hand.

"I don't really need your permission."I replied moving past him. He grabbed my hand and pulled me closer to him.

I crashed my body against his. I looked up at him and moved my face. I looked down at his lips and leaned in a little bit.

"Your just mad because it wasn't you."I said looking at him.

"It wasn't me for what?"he asked stepping closer.

"That I slept with."I said looking at him.

"Your joking right?"he asked looking at me. For a second my confidence dropped.

"Your trying to find your boyfriend who may or may not be dead. And while your doing so you sleep with other guys. And as you do that you keep his necklace on. Yeah I'm totally mad that you didn't sleep with me."Jacob scoffed sarcastically moving past me.

I made a face and grabbed his hand. I pulled him over to me making his body collide with mine. We both fell on the ground and he landed on top of me.

He lifted his weight off of me and instead put his elbows on the ground.

I lifted my head up.

"I know how you feel Jacob. But I don't wanna loose you. And I love Erick. And if I ever slept with you I'd hate myself because I don't wanna loose you. And if we sleep together I'm gonna end up hurting you. And in the end your gonna hate me."I said tearing up.

He gently wiped away my tear.

"I get it."he replied looking at me. He moved my hair away from my face and leaned in. He softly kissed my lips and pulled away.

I knew it was wrong but I did it anyway. I grabbed his neck and pressed my lips on his. I didn't feel that way towards Jacob. But he was there and we had an emotional connection.

Not to mention I was a wreck. But he still loved me. I know what I did was wrong. And that I was leading him on by kissing him. I was playing him unintentionally but it didn't matter at that moment.

I knew that with every kiss and every action I did I was hurting him but I didn't think.

I pulled Jacobs shirt over his head and kissed his chest. I made a trail back up to his lips and kissed him. His hand made its way to my thigh and moved upwards.

He made small circles on the inside of my thighs and moved his hand up and under my shirt. I moved my leg so that it was on top of him and kissed hard.

He lifted my shirt over my head and looked at me.

"I-are, are you sure?"I asked looking at him. He nodded.

There's no going back.

I reattached my lips on his. The rest of the night was filled my pleasure and sadness.

It felt good but it was gonna end up tearing us up.