Amoung The Shadows

Chapter 24-Goodbye My First Love

I dont know why. I dont know where from. It came and overcame. Sometimes people tend to get swallowed by grief. Mainly, that grief comes from fear or anger.
I was taken by both.
I didnt mean to be so cruel to Gally. I can only imagine the pain he went through.
No. Never mind! I did mean every second of it.
See? That indecisive thought process is what I've been swimming in for the 3 days that have passed ever since I hurt Gally.
Those days, I spent cooped up in my cabin. My food was brought by Peter who would occasionally talk to me. Then he would hurry away, pretending to have somewhere to go, in fear of my salty tears.
Peculiar how most boys are afraid of strong feelings. Apparently, the demon Pan, is of no exception.
Yes, my anger is slightly geared toward Peter as well. How dare he let me near Gally? In fact, how dare he let me glance at him to say the least?!
Alas, it was my choice to let the troubled boy live. Maybe I shouldnt be that angry at Peter...

I thought as I lay in my cabin.
"I feel like a piece of klunk." I thought out loud.
"But you're my peice of klunk." I heard outloud. I gasped and shot out of my bed. "Who's there?!" I called out in the dark cabin.
"Name's Newt, Greenie." Said the voice. My breath left my lungs.

The voice seemed to have come from the direction of the cabin door. I whipped around, and sure enough, in three shadows of the room stood Newt.
He walked over to me slowly. I edged away with every step. This isn't possible!
Newt was in the Looking Glass! Here was no way he could have escaped!
I thought. Mentally scolding myself for sounding like I wanted Newt to be stuck in The Looking Glass.

I studied Newt. He wore the same clothes that he wore in the Glade. He had paler skin than usual. He had dark circles under his eyes. His light brown eyes that once twinkled with joy, were now aglow with another, strange light. Something that resembled lust. Not the romantic kind of lust, but the blood-loving lust...His cheek bones stood out more slightly.
Let me tell you, all though this look was "sexy" in a way...
If your lover came back from most certain banishment, you would be scared. Not intimidated.

His eyes looked me up and down, something he had never done before...Then his lips crashed on to mine and his hands flew to my waist. I gasped lightly. Then, I noticed he had seemed to kiss harder and this time, I responded. My lips moved against his as he led me to the wall, not breaking the kiss.
He began to trail kisses down my neck. When he reached my collar bone, he lightly bit it. I tangled my fingers in his hair.
He trailed his hands to the backs of my thighs and I wrapped my legs around his waist.
He carried me to the bed and laid me down. As soon as my back made contact with the sheets, he attacked my lips once more. His hands slipped under my shirt.
I grasped his shoulders.

How far did he want to take this? Why did he suddenly come back from the Looking Glass, and begin to show his feelings for me in such a way? What changed in him? Thoughts swirled around my head.

Soon his shirt was off and mine was too. His lips were once again on my neck, leaving a trail of burning kisses. The only things that seperated us were my bra, panties, leggings, his pants, and hopefully his underwear. (I never asked him if he wore underwear or not, I was sort of hoping he did...) I was suddenly aware that on Neverland, there really was no protection... I'm serious! I dont want to get pregnant at age 17!
"Newt " I said breathlessly as he nibbled on my soft skin, effectively scattering my thoughts.
"Hmm?" Was his muffled answer.
"Newt. Stop." I said once I regained my train of thought.
His lips lingered on my skin. "Why?" He asked.
My blood cooled. "I...I-I dont think we should go this far yet..." I said quietly. "Why not?. He asked and layed on his side on his elbow, looking down on me. I felt his warm skin on mine. Our chests touching. "What if someone sees us?" I asked him. He shrugged. "So what? Let them see us. They know that we're in love."He answered. I nodded and put my hand on his arm. "As much as I love you, I dont really think this is a good time." I said. "Besides, you just came in here from the Looking Glass. No explanation." I said. He looked at my lips then back at my eyes. He sighed. "Well...It was fun while it lasted." He said. I raised my brow.
"I am dieng." He said. "I was given a choice. I could visit my mother, my father, my sister, or you before I died."He said sadly. "Given a choice by who?" I asked him. "The owner of the Looking Glass, Allison." He said sadly. I nodded. "I chose you because you're the only person that ever stood by me in life. The only person who ever listened to me. I didnt really know my mother, or father, or sister. I'm sure that they were all lovely. I also know that they arnt really alive. Allison just wanted me gone." He said. He put his hand on my cheek and rubbed his thumb across my cheek. Then, he gasped and grabbed his chest. He groaned and fell on his back from his previous position. "Newt!" I gasped.

"Faith, I love you. " He said. Then, he began to fade as though a hologram. "No! This isnt how it ends! Dont go!" I shouted at him. I tried to grab him, but my hands went through him. "Please!" I gasped.

A sob escaped my throat when Newt faded completely.
He's gone. He's really gone. This is the end. I will never see him again.
I realized.
"Calm down Faith. Faith! Shhhh it's just a dream!" I heard. Then, Allison appeared in ny room. Expressionlessly she grabbed my shoulders and shook me. I smacked her hand away.
"GET AWAY FROM ME YOU SON OF A BITCH!" I screamed. "Faith It's just me!" She said in a low, boyish voice. I realized that the voice was Peter's.

With another shake, I was jolted awake.
.
.
.
Peter held me in his warm arms. "Shhh. Calm down. You're safe. You're safe. I'm here." He coaxed. I pushed him away and jumped out of the bed.

I bolted out of my cabin, not caring about my shoes that seemed to call to me, warning me about what would happen if I went outside without them.

I ran through camp. When I stepped onto the grass that lead into the forest, I stopped. This is the line between the safety of camo and the dangers of the dark forest. I stepped over into the shadow of the trees.

I ran and I ran. Soon, I found myself at the place where I discovered that Newt was a shadow. I saw something moving in the dark infront of me. The object was quite large. It seemed to be the silhouette of a human. No. Not a silhouette. A shadow.

I ran to him and dropped down beside him. All I could see was his glowing white eyes. He seemed to be fading. "Newt!" I cried. The shadow turned to me and its eyes seemed to widen.
You cant be here! He spoke in my head.
"No! I cant leave you like this! I dont care if you're not human, you are still Newt...my Newt! Nothing will ever change that! Did you really think I would stay put when I learned you were dieng?!" I asked him. The shadow seemed to sigh.

It began to fade once again, It's legs gone. Now, only a torso and head remained. "Please! Dont leave me like this! Stay with me!" I choked on my tears. How could he die like this? All of the sudden?
I love you Faith, but its time to end my suffering. The Maze...I hated it there, Faith. Did I ever tell you how I got my limp? I jumped off of the Maze wall, Faith. I tried to kill myself. Neverland wasnt much better. I was turned into a damn shadow! I think I would be better off not stuck in a mirror, but in the clouds. Or, if there isn't heaven, then asleep.
He said in my head. I was so focused on my thoughts. It came like a whisper. Then, it was more clear.
Goodbye Faith. I'm so sorry.
I looked at the shadow the only taking that was left were the eyes.
Surprisingly, his eyes were the same light chocolate color that I loved. Not the white orbs that they were.

Then, all together he was gone. All of him this time.

Rain began to fall. So did my tears. I cried, so did the heavens.

Wow. So I bet you didnt expect that...neither did I...
I am truly sorry. I just killed my favorite character in my book. This is harder than I thought. You know how authors always kill the characters we love, well now I know what it feels like. Honestly, I doesnt feel nice. Newt passed away because I kept thinking about how bad he was suffering. As horrible as it was to lose him, we can hope that death ended his pains. He was too young to be put through what even some adults couldnt withstand.

As always, I am sorry for the late update...I hope that the wait was worth it...
Goodbye, and may the odds be ever in your favor!
💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙