off the map ➳ grayson

f o u r

Chapter 4: Findind courage

"Mommy?"

Cold blood was running through my veins and I was sweating like mad. All hell broke free.

What would happen?

I eyed Grayson carefully and tried to examine him. I couldn't understand what was going through his mind and what he possible was thinking. His gaze was back and forth.

I swallowed the bump on my throat and tried to find the right words." Go inside baby." I said pointing to the living room.

Grayson put up his hand stopping me." No. Stop." He ordered me and I saw him go and bent down to him.

"Hey buddy. What's your name?" He asked with a cute and nice voice, which melt my heart and brought tears to my eyes.

"Valentino." His baby voice said as he had his pacifier in his mouth.

So everyone, meet my son. My baby boy Valentino. That was my biggest secret, well....not that secret anymore. It was only a secret from Grayson, his family and friends. Everyone else knew.

We didn't say anything else when Michaela came to the house, interrupting us but saving me as well.

"Hey Grayson." She said as she placed the pizza boxes by the table. He just nodded his head.

"Michaela, please take Valentino inside." I pleaded her and she immediately nodded her head. She took in her lap Valentino and left the kitchen.

I was looking at the floor, I couldn't see Grayson in the eyes. How could I? I didn't have the right to.

"Grayson I can explain." I decided to start with the cliché phrase.

"He's so beautiful." He instead replied. I swallowed and nodded my head.

"Yeah...Gray please."

"You don't have the right to call me this anymore. You lost it the day you decide to leave without caring who you leave behind you." He shot back angry.

But before I could reply to him, he had left the house closing the door with a loud bang. I knew he is angry and upset and broken.

I had cause all these feelings and I would never forgive me for this. I was so stupid to act like this.

Also I didn't know if he believed that Valentino was his son or anyone else's. Probably the latter. He probably believed that I cheat on him and that's why I left.

Wiping my tears from my eyes, I walked in the living room where Michaela was currently along with Valentino. They were watching Disney channel.

I sat beside them and I took Valentino on my lap and hugged him. I could not help it but let my tears run down.

"What did he say? He left without letting you explain, right?" Michaela whispered to me. I looked at her and tearfully nodded my head.

"Mommy, who is that?" Valentino asked me suddenly pointing to the door. I smiled at him and kissed his cheek.

"That was Grayson, baby." I told him. He placed his hand on my cheek and laughed as he poked me." No, don't do that. It's not good."

"No!" Valentinowined but laughed again when he poked me and I let him. I couldn't resist him. He was my world.

"Val, do you want to eat?" Michaela asked me as she tickled his sides.

He giggled but yelled: Yes!

We sat up and walked to the kitchen. I helped Valentinoto one of the stools and Michaela gave each a plate. I placed a slice of pizza in Valentino's plate and gave it to him. Without saying anything he took it and started eating.

"Do you like it here Valentino?" Michaela questioned him. I was okay with this. I was revealed that she preferred to talk with Valentinorather start talking about Grayson.

I only saw him nodded. I watched him eating and I smiled to myself. That little boy made and still is making my life so much more better. He lighten it with his little laugh, smile. I couldn't imagine my life without him. I was sure that I made the right decision about him and he proves me everyday that he was worth every single thing on that earth.

Valentino as I had named him, was the perfect combination of me and Grayson. Although he only had my nose. From what I remembered Valentino was exactly like Grayson when he was a baby himself. And had exactly the same personality with the only difference that Valentino didn't get angry easily. Okay, you will say he is a baby and you don't get to know that yet. And I will say you are right but let me tell you that when I tell him that he did something wrong and needed to calm down and go to his room and play there, he nods his head and does as he is told. If Grayson was told what to do he will raise hell, as his mother told me.

I was glad about that. Well, Valentino was and is an easy baby. He didn't wake up late on night, he usually wouldn't cry that much. I was lucky about this.

He walked on his first birthday. His first word was momma. He likes playing football. He loves ice cream. He fancies the beach.

I wanted to share all these things with Grayson. I wanted him to know how it feels to be a parent. To have someone call you mommy and daddy. To feel those little hands hug you and those little lips kiss you.

You could never know that feeling until you become a parent.

And I believe that I had possibly found the way to speak with Grayson. Explain how the things are.

I was shook out of my thoughts when I heard a mommy and Hayden. I looked up at some of the most precious people in my life." Sorry. I was daydreaming." I apologized.

"We can see that. Mommy is silly, isn't she?" Michaela asked in her baby voice Valentino. He smiled widely showing us his perfect and white little teeth, but he had some yet to grow.

"No, mommy loves Valentino." I cried and kissed Valentino's hands. He took his hands back and pointed to the ground.

"Dow. Dow." He said down, telling us that he wants to be down on the floor. I sat up and after cleaning his mouth I put him down like he wanted to. Valentino took his pacifier and run to the living room and laid on the sofa and watched cartoons.

I turned around and started cleaning the plates. I shoved them on the sink while I talked with Michaela who was cuting the fruits and the things she bought earlier in their place. I was going to put them before but someone distracted me.

"Okay, I have to say that I have not seen a beautiful baby like Rafael never in my life." She announced.

"I know, right?!"

"He has the good genes from his dad." She pointed out and I rolled my eyes playfully.

"Thanks." I said sarcastically. Of course he got the good genes from Grayson.

"You're welcome. What do you want to do tomorrow?"

"I don't know. Anything you want but let me first talk with Grayson."

"You are going to finally talk with him?"

"I think so." I sighed as I wiped my hands in a towel. I was now facing her." I am going to try."

"And you think he will want to?"

"He doesn't have any other choice."

"What if he still doesn't want to see you?"

"Then I will go and talk with Ethan. He will help me. I'm one hundred percent sure for this." I said surely.

"Yeah...okay then. Good luck with this."

Hey guys! New chapter yay. Its small, I know. But I hope that you will pardon me because I made a video about the cast of the story, which is on the top. Also in the photo is Valentino   as I imagine him to be.

One more thing I want to say is that I made Grayson a little bit OCC which means a little bit different for his real character! Only for the shake of the story!

 Thank you for sticking with me!