Remembrance- A Before You Exit Fanfiction

Bye.

Tears fell down my face as I hugged Tanner goodbye. We'd gotten so close since I came home and now I'm leaving all over again. I feel like I'm constantly leaving people, just doing what I think is best for everyone and hurting everyone. Maybe I shouldn't be leaving all the time, but I feel like it's the only thing I can do.

For me, running is escaping whether its physically or mentally. Before my parents died, I would run away with music. I would stay in my room and blast my music through my headphones, goofing off on my tablet or just daydreaming about my crush. I would escape the world with music and I actually had, and still have a playlist of songs that help me escape the world and it's called exactly that. People, like my brother, honestly don't understand how improtant music can be in someones life and they probably won't ever know what it's like to be apart of a fandom or to have such a great love for a band or singer that it hurts when they hurt. You feel happy when their happy, you can feel their emotion through one little Tweet or Facebook post. My brother, again is a perfect example of someone who will never understand this. He'll never understand what it's like to only feel loved by this band or this one person. He doesn't know what it's like to rely on pictures of that person to help you through a bad day and he doesn't understand what it's like to know that that one person, they're the only person who could ever understand who you are, and they don't even know who you are. Drew always used to tease me about my obsession with several different bands like Sleeping with Sirens or Paradise Fears or Peirce the Veil or even Rascal Flatts. He never understood how I could put a smile on my face every day, only because of them. Because he didn't understand, he'd laugh at me and make fun of me and sometimes, more often than not, he'd hit me and say I'm obsessed and take my ipod away from me. This is where the running came in. I used to listen to mostly pop until my brother teased me for being dedicated to One Direction. After that, my friend introduced me to Sleeping With Sirens and now, they're the only way to get me out of an angry mood. I'm one of those people who will stay mad at you until you give me a good reason not to be mad anymore, so the fact that I can listen to 3 minutes of Kellin Quinn and come out with a smile is a miracle. So, maybe running is a good thing when I'm only running from reality, but maybe it's not so good when I'm running from my actual reality. I need to stop running from the ones I love, and instead, run to them. It's what I'm doing now, isn't it?

"You should go or you won't get home in time." Tanner said, pulling away from our tight hug.

"I'll be back soon, I promise." I said, wiping my tears away.

"You two are such a cute couple! I wish I had that when I was your age." A woman beside us pouted.

"HE'S MY COUSIN!" I said, discusted at the pure thought of it.

"I am so sorry." The woman said, trying to hold in her laughter slightly.

"Go whore!" Tanner yelled, pushing my butt towards the truck.

"Call me if you need anything!" I yelled back, wiggling my ass as I climbed into the large truck.

"I will! Luff you Simba!" Tanner called out, waving as I started my truck.

"Luff you too Mufasa!" I yelled out the window as I pulled off the curb.

Here we go again.

-----------------

It felt weird, driving around such a familiar place, yet not knowing where you're going or what you're doing there. It feels almost unreal to be back in Florida. It's like I'm reliving a memory that I wanted to be forgotten. I felt so out of place as I drove past the highschool, the stores, our favorite Starbucks, the McDonough's house. I almost wanted to go over there and pet Tank one more time. Kiss the picture of Captain they kept on the mantle to keep his memory. I felt tears welling in me as I just thought of the sweet dog, thinking of Sam. As I drove closer and closer towards the house I used to call home, I grew slightly nervous, having not seen my parents for over 4 months considering I never saw them when I came back from London. I almost didn't pull into the driveway out of my own terror. As I turned my truck off, I banged my head onto the steering wheel. I accidentally hit the horn once, the loud noise causing my dogs to bark loudly. I could hear a muffled cry running towards the front door as I opened up my tailgate, setting my things on the driveway. Tears were already flooding my face when Mum burst through the front door and ran into me, holding onto me like I was a dead child that came back to life.