Vitamin D (Frerard)

Dead Birds Still Fly (SMUT)

I took off the nose sweater and looked to the shit-stained skies. The moon was rising but you could still see red and orange in the sky at the bottom. I looked down at my neck tie and remembered that we were still looking very formal. We had ruined our outfits from the day, but at least I could buy a new one. Frank was somewhat irreplaceable. You could also buy another Frank, but that would be illegal.

"Let me help you" Frank said, pulling at my tie.

He started removing the razor blades using one that he pulled of his own tie. All in all I had 15 razor blades. Where the fuck did I get all these.

"Now this is the fun part."

He took one of his that he had on his own tie and threw out the window at a bird. He missed the bird, but it got stuck into a tree.

"Here, you try"

I threw all of my blades out the window at a crow and one managed to hit it. The bird fell out of the tree when it got hit by the flying projectile.

Frank looked deep into my orbs for a few moments before cracking them in half.

"YOU CAN NO LONGER BE A MEDIUM! YOU ARE A LARGE!" He screamed.

He then moved back to my eyes and locked himself into the them. There was no way of getting out of the seeing prison I called my pupils. 

"Gerard, dead birds still fly." He whispered.

I swooned.

Looking at him now, he looked like Hank Hill.

"Eh-WHUAT BOBBEHH!!" He screamed.

My heart started racing and it took everything in me to hold myself back from screaming as well.

I pulled his face to mine and made sure his eyes met mine. I wiggled my ears and a spider crawled out. This meant that I wanted to be alone, and she new this.

"OPEN YER MOUFF HANKLE"

I shoved the spider into his mouth and he but down with a hard crunch. He smiled widely. His teeth had spider legs and guts in them.

I licked them off.

"I like you." I said sweetly to frankadoblerobler.

"Oh I know."

He hooked his arm around my neck and pinned me to the floor of the treehouse. He pulled me back away from the door and shut it with his foot. He then took of his shoe and sock.

"Shh." He said, putting his pinky toe over my mouth. It left a slightly salty taste lingering in my lips. "It's just us and the moon peaking in from the holes in the wood." He stated, ending it with a wink.

"Hi there, just checking in." The moon said gayly, opening the pieces of wood they were looking through. "If you need condoms or anything, give me a shout."

The moon closed back up the pieces of wood, leaving us alone again.

Frankaminkalong bit my ear and rubbed his body up against mine, acting as a worm. He began to spastically flail his body, knocking the breath away from my lungs and mouth. God it felt erotic.

I pinched my fingers together,making an 'O' shape, and put them inches away from his face.

"Bapity boopity. That's a spicy meatball." I said, wiggling my hand to get my point further across.

I felt his dickle pickle get stiff.

"This ketchup is too spicy" he whispered into my ear.

My two prickly doo daas became hard as well.