~Imogen's POV~
After Aspyn left the next day after sleeping over, I stayed up in my room for a good couple of hours before we had to go to support group. We did the same old thing, and it was honestly kind of hard, having to say that I am suicidal...I mean it's never easy having to admit your flaws anyways.
I was on house arrest for the next few days, because I had managed to tear the stitches on my rib cage which caused for a scare. Mum had to rush me to the hospital and get them redone, I don't even know how it happened because I am lazy as fuck.
I spent four days cooped up in my room reading, eating, and sleeping. Aspyn came over a few times to tell me about what was going on in the outside world.
I'm sitting on my cold wood flooring now, staring at a small duffel bag filled with clothes, toiletries, and of course some stuffed animals. Tomorrow I'm getting 'shipped off' to the hospital.
I'm absolutely nervous because mum said they would keep me there as long as it took for me to, improve. She says I'll be just fine, but what if I don't ever improve, what if I'm stuck there forever.
Does everyone expect me to come back from that and be totally, normal? What if I can't do that...
I grip my head in my hands and take deep breaths. Everything is going to be fine, your okay. No your not, your never going to be 'okay'
I grip my head harder in my hands and let out a small scream of frustration. Your going to get better and come home normal. Normal! You'll never be normal. Get that through your head!
I shoot up from the floor and start pacing around my room, breath in...breath out...in...out. The reason your going to the hospital is because everyone is so sick of you! They need a break from you constantly being in their face. Shut up! Shut up!...I'm okay...I won't do anything stupid...calm..down.
My head is killing me and I let out a loud scream hitting the floor on my knees, cradling myself. "Shut up! Get out of my head!" I yell louder, gripping my skull.
A knock is sounded at the door as I'm laying on the floor. That's probably your friend coming over to tell you once you leave, to never come back!
The pain is escalated in my head and I dig my fingers into my scalp letting out another scream. "GET OUT OF MY HEAD!" Tears are now running down my face and my throat is hoarse from yelling.
"Get out of my head...get out of my head..get out.." I whisper now, rocking myself back and forth. My door bursts open and Aspyn immediately comes over to me and clings onto my body. "Get out of my head." I whisper again, barely audible.
"What happened?" Aspyn asks softly.
"Please don't let me go, I can't go Aspyn." I say to her.
"Imogen." She says comfortingly. "Look at you now...huh? You need to go..we aren't forcing you. You need to help yourself, please."
"Please promise you won't leave when I get back." I say looking straight into her eyes.
"Of course I wouldn't Im. Why would you think that?" She asks confusion laced into her voice. She's lying, as soon as you get back...you'll be on your own!
