Midnight Memories

Why now?

You know how people say that if you love two people choose the second because if you really loved the first then there wouldn't be a second? Or something like that... Well that really isn't that easy.

I miss him. A lot. And he's far away from me. I miss his arms around me. I miss curling up on the couch watching Harry Potter. I miss the feeling of his lips against mine, and just how perfect we fit together.

That night we hung out him and my best friend were messin with me and "making fun" of me. So to see how he would handle if I got mad/ upset I walked away and threw myself on the couch acting like I was hurt by their words. He came to me and reached out to me and apologized and reminded me that he owed me a hug (from a Facebook post). I just shook my head "nope."

"Emm.please? I'm sorry."

We hadn't known each other long and he had already gone to calling me Em and I loved it.

"Nope." I said crossing my arms.

"Fine." He mumbled dropping onto the love seat that was beside the couch(they sat perpendicular to each other making a L).

Glancing over at him I couldn't help but smile because he had his chin resting in his hand,elbow on the arm rest, looking at me with those beautiful blue eyes.

I shook my head, rolled my eyes and turned my attention back to the tv. He dropped his arm across the armrests so his hand was right in front of me. I glanced at it and shaking my head I took it standing up pulling him with me then hugged him. We stood like that for a while, it still wasn't long enough.

He sat back on the couch as I went into the kitchen to check on my friend who was making a cake. We had some issues with cake that night. This time(cake 2) she forgot to spray the pan so I just walked away returning to the living room.

He was sprawled out on the couch and just went and sat between his legs and he pulled me to him.

Now if you know me, you know it usually takes me a while to get to where I'll cuddle with anyone. Like we gotta be super close. But I had known him for barely 2 days and I was a goner.

We kissed and I felt butterflies. My hand reaching back to him pulling him closer. He turned me so I was facing him more and I wrapped my arms around him my hands in his hair.

He asked me to be his girlfriend. I said nothing. He told me I didn't have to answer immediately and I nodded and said "okay, I'll let you know." He smiled, nodded then dropped his head into the crook of my neck and I just held him running my hands through his hair.

That was guy number 2. He told me he missed me, my kisses, holding me. He told me he wanted to be with me and he was scared. Why now?

Guy number 1 is a different story.

He is the one with the age difference. If you've read those you know that he has now liked me for 2 years and still does. We are friends, because he can't date me. (He isn't 18)

But I almost wonder if our sexual tension that is still existent is because nothing happened for us and we are still curious. We are really comfortable around each other like we can hold hands, walk around with his arm across my shoulder mine around his waist and talk easily. But what if that is just because of our friendship. What if it has nothing to do with us liking each other.

Maybe he's the one who will replace my ex-best friend who broke my heart...maybe not. I just don't know.

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The picture above show lyrics from
Vanessa Hudgins:
Baby Come Back to Me

It's been forever since I have heard this song but it pops into my head every once in a while...just thought it fit how I feel right now.