Feels Like 13

The Weekend of Random Tears

So it was Saturday, and I had spent the day watching movies, getting homework done and doing a little housework. And the fun y I got was I had gotten it all done before 9:00 am. My Nana had called me and asked if I wanted to go dress shopping. I was in a mood, and it wasn't a good mood for company. But as soon as I was off the phone, I immediately wished I could have changed my mind. But I didn't and definatly regretted it. That Saturday was spent crying for no good reason at all, and wishing I lived closer to Daniel. He was visiting his Nana, about an hours walk from me, maybe longer, but he always made the trip if he was staying there overnight. He would come down to see me and we would just talk and watch movie and eat chips and stuff.

But his weekend was different. His Nana was sick, and his mom said he needed to stay with her because she might be dying. But, I was in a selfish mood, and wished his Nana would either get better or die faster. I didn't tell him that of course. He loved his Nana, and she was a very nice lady, but I didn't care at this point in time. When your on your "Lady Days" all you need is a pint of ice cream, a blanket, your boyfriend to cuddle with and the best season of Family Guy available to you. Or maybe Trailer Park Boys. Or better, South Park.
At least, that cheers me up.

Instead, I was stuck with a milkshake, Ted 2, a pillow and a stuffed cat. That made me feel a little better, and then it didn't because it reminded me I was kinda a looser. Only thing that would have made me feel less like a looser was if Bugs Bunny had been on TV. There was another disappointment.

On top of my crying fits, mom was on day shift, so she couldn't try and calm me down at all, making disappointment #3.

When mom did get home, she helped me figure out why I was so upset for no reason.
My biological father, Christopher, hadn't called me in 6 months to talk to me. Every time he did call, I would pick up and would immediately here "Where is your mom?"
No "How's school?" Or "Its nice to hear your voice." He only called regarding child support payments, and for a while, he was "forgetting" to pay those too. Why I, of all people, had to be given the dead beat father.

But aside from that asshole move he pulled, I had to keep contact with him because I have sisters. GiGi and Kayla, and I miss them so much. They are my real reason for keeping contact with him, because if they didn't exist, I would have severed everything. I would have blocked that bastard a longtime ago. And on top of uprooting my sisters, the woman he had them with wasn't even my mother. Not my first stepmothers, either.

Okay, let's start from the beginning here.
Chris married my mom, had me, and as soon as I was home and settled in, he was up and out. They got the divorce in October of 2003, and he had already started dating Josie, my first step mom, August of that year before him and my mom were divorced. I know this because then thereafter Chris cheated on Josie with Stella, and Stella was 7 months pregnant before he and Josie were broken up. No one would explain it to me because I was after all, I was only 6, but I wish that I would have understood it all. Then I would have seen the cheating, prickish, asshole man he has always been.

But ANYWAY, that was how I spent Saturday, but Sunday was proving to be better. I was debating whether or not I should call Nana- and then suddenly I change my mind. I'm gonna go with Nana because I am so bored here. Maybe I will update later.
Next Thursday is the school dance, (which is in 5 days including today, Go Me,) and I promised to "surprise" Daniel with a little somethin' somethin', and I haven't figured out what, I bet he is expecting something in the way of............ Well.......... You get it. So, I think to add to the surprise, I'm gonna get a new dress.

Surprise, Daniel.