Contradiction: Sequel to Fracture.

Chapter 1

With revenge as my compass

And vengeance as my guide

I turned away from forgiveness

And became the evil I despised.

-E. Dadelik

It was the calm that disturbed me. At four in morning, the night sky still hung heavy, clinging to the place I once called my home. Despite the quiet evening, the home before me gave off an imposing twisted presence. I climbed out of the cab and stared at it. It was still and unmoving. Nothing like the frantic pace of my mind. 

I stared up the street and wondered for the hundredth time if I should just pass right through. My family wasn't expecting me. As far as they knew I was still gone, never to return. If I left now they wouldn't even know I was here. Instead, I straightened my duffel bag on my shoulder and walked quietly around the back of the house.

Years of trying to be invisible had trained me to enter and leave unnoticed. Combined with the scent masking spray that I took from Lucas, I knew no one would notice me. I climbed up the tree that rested against my old bedroom window and slid open the window, pleased that no one had repaired the lock since I left.

Quietly I snuck into my room and looked around. In the moonlight I could see that it had been undisturbed since my departure. Everything was still the same. Stuff animals line my bookshelf, my mirror still had stickers on it and my bedding was white with purple pillows. It was clear that my life here had stopped, frozen in time. 

I knew that this was my room, but it didn't feel like it. I wasn't the little girl who grew up here. I wasn't even the broken girl that left it behind. The attachments I had to the place had left. Nothing of it stirred any desire to remain here. Even though I had left a few months ago, it was clear I had moved on. It held nothing in common with who I now was.

I sat on my armchair and looked around, wondering why I came to the house at all.

"We cannot live here." Said my wolf, looking at the room in sadness.

"I know. This room looks like something for a teenager who believed in fairytales." I said, a bitter taste filling my mouth.

"It's not just the room. People are expecting the girl of this room to come back. A naive teenager, without her wolf. Someone weak, someone sweet. Not us." She said.

I leaned forward, my elbows resting on my knees, index finger on my lips.

I didn't even feel the same way about my parents as I used too. I loved them, but I couldn't pretend them leading me to death didn't affect it. The unconditional love that I had had for them had change to one of obligation. They stood by, watching me die. I didn't trust them and didn't feel safe around them. Such emotions had a manner of rusting love. It was painfully clear that I didn't belong in their home.

 I was a person that didn't have a specific place in this world.

"What should I do?" I asked my wolf inwardly.

"We go to the wedding. We live with no regrets. We try to be, present wherever we are." She replied.

"Okay. So long as you don't leave me on my own this time." I replied tersely.

"I'm getting stronger each day.  We will make it through this." She replied.

I took a deep breathe and decided to get out of the room. The pink walls and stuff animals left me unsettled. The room made me feel like I was intruding on someone else life. I would go to the wedding, get it over with and figure what to do next. First I had to get out of here. I jumped out the window, leaving my childhood house as quietly as I had arrived.