- Week 3 of relationship -
Today he opened up to me, Yes it was over text. I wish it was in real life. Nearly everything we said to each other was over some sort of social media app. I still didn't care how we talked it just mattered if we talked. I couldn't stand going a whole day without speaking to him. When he opened up to me, it was mainly about his family problems, and his insecurities. I told him that I loved all his flaws and imperfections. I also told him he would always have a shoulder to cry on, Always.
He asked if I had any problems or fears.
I told him my only problem was with myself.
And my only fear was losing him.
That night I cried myself to sleep, not because I was sad, but because I felt like I was holding a diamond while walking over a thin wire, I was so scared that I might loose my balance. I wasn't scared of hurting myself, I was scared of smashing the diamond.
He was my diamond.
And I only get one diamond.
I felt my toes curl up, the muscles all over my body tensed, my bed screeched under the violent movement of my reckless ways. I kicked my legs and screamed. I grit my teeth down and screamed into my pillow. I flung myself up and out of my bed I stumbled over to my wardrobe and started pulling cloths out and ripping them up. Then I walked over to my desk. Picked up a snow globe, took a deep breath and then threw it as hard as I could. I then pulled my mirror of the wall and threw it to the floor. The glass shattered everywhere, like a mini explosion of pain. I fell to the floor, lying on the broken pieces of glass. I watched as my hands led the rest of my body over to a diamond shaped piece of glass. I took the object but did not cut myself. I looked at it. I stared at it. And then I put it down.
I woke up cold.
I woke up scared.
I woke up alone.
