How to Fall in Love in Three Easy Steps

Chapter 20

Later that Saturday evening, Jack found himself staring at an English assignment that he wasn't sure would ever get done. Who needed pronouns anyway? The day's events wouldn't leave him, the harsh words haunting his thoughts, echoing throughout his brain. Jack felt more and more digusted each time he recalled what his former friends had spat at Jack and Alex, just because they liked each other.

It was perplexing to Jack how someone else could tell another person to kill themselves without feeling anything. Under all that hatred, isn't there remorse and guilt hidden away in small crevices and cracks? And where did all that hatred spur from? Was it from a bad experience as a child? A parents daunting words? Or had they been through so much shit that they felt the need to hurt others? Was it really that despicable to fancy a man over a woman, or vice-versa? Even within the darkest parts of himself, Jack couldn't find the audacity to tell someone to end their own life. In fact, he was unable to fathom the idea of the feeling of those words leaving his lips.

"Why don't you ki-" Jack whispered, testing out the words, feeling them on the tip of his tongue.

As the single syllable was uttered, Jack found his mouth shut, and phrases race throughout his mind.

"My god, please don't do that to yourself, don't, don't, don't," filled his brain.

A smile crept up on Jack's lips, relieved that he could not do it. Just as he attempted to focus back on his work, there was a slight thud against the door as someone struggled to turn the knob. Curses streamed from the person's mouth as they tried to maunever around whatever he was trying not to drop. The door pushed open a crack before a foot came into contact with it, slamming it into the wall. On the other side stood Darryl, propping up a bloodshot-eyed Alex.

"We have a problem," Darryl muttered while dragging Alex inside and pushing him towards Jack's bed. He stumbled back a bit, almost teetering backwards, but eventually collapsed onto the small cot.

"Wha-" Jack began, but was quickly interrupted by the sound of Alex retching onto the bed sheets.

"Fuck!" Jack yelled, grabbing the small wastebasket in the room and forcing Alex's head over the opening. By the time Alex was finished, Jack's hands and Alex's front were covered with sick. Jack and Darryl glanced at each other before each taking one of Alex's arms and hauling him down the hall. Students peeked at the three boys, staring at then as they struggled down the halls.

In the bathroom, they stripped off Alex's shirts, pants, and shoes, leaving him in a pair of socks and underwear. He seemed so tender and defenseless, half conscious on the floor of the shower. Jack turned on the water and let it drip until it was warm, running it over Alex's naked torso, trying to clean him off. Darryl ran out of the room to fetch Alex some clothes, leaving Jack crouched on the ground, rubbing soap onto his boyfriend's face. It was at a moment like this that Jack felt less like one of Alex's good friends and more like his boyfriend, like someone who would do shit like this for him, like someone who cared.

"Fuck, Jack," Alex mumbled, finally coming back to his senses, "Where am I?"

"Don't worry about it."

"My mom... I think I yelled at her. I don't know actually. I'm tired," he slurred.

"Go back to sleep."

Within seconds, Alex passed out once agan, the room filled with the sound of the running water. Alex's head lolled to the side as he dozed gently, twitching slightly each time Jack began to wash a new area of his body. Once he was clean, the shower was turned off and a warm towel was wrapped around him. Alex was shivering as he stepped out, with Jack's help, the frigid November air chilling him to the bone, Jack put his arm around Alex, allowing him to snuggle into Jack's shoulder, his damp hair sticking to Jack's neck. There was a lull of silence in the air, the shower dripping only occasionally. Jack squeezed Alex, holding him close, wanting to console for whatever had happened between him and his mom. Had she asked about his sexuality? Or criticized him for being with Jack? Perhaps she had been furious with Alex and had screamed at him. Jack tried not to think of not being able to go out with Alex anymore, the thought bringing a sour feeling to his stomach. But what if she still had no clue, unaware of the relationship between her son and his best friend?