unsaid things // phan (on hold)

Withered

(PHIL'S POV)
I writhe around in my bed only to feel cold. I'm searching with my hands for something warm when I feel a Dan-less cold mass beside me. I open my eyes and sit up.

I reach over to my nightstand and grab my thick, black, rectangular glasses and put them on my face as the room comes into focus.

I step out of bed and gingerly walk across the room, when I hear a soft whimper coming from what sounds like down the hall. I poke my head out the doorframe, and when no one's there, I proceed to walk down the carpeted hallway wondering what I'll find at the end of it.

When I'm about to pass the bathroom, I hear a choked sob coming from a corner in the back. I walk in and see a small, frail looking Dan curled up in the corner, hugging his knees to his chest. His eyes are squeezed shut and he's rocking back and forth, sobbing, tears falling from his eyes.

I kneel down next to him, and cautiously place my hand on his shivering shoulder. Dan jumps at the touch, but relaxes when he sees that it's only me. "Dan, what's wrong?" I ask, worry and confusion slipping through my words. He looks at me with those big, beautiful, caramel eyes and then turns away, not making eye contact with me anymore.

"I-it's n-nothingg." He replies in a small voice. "I j-just had a b-badd dream."

"Was it about your father again?" Dan nods. I grab his shaking hand in my own, when Dan winces and I feel something warm and wet slithering through his fingers. I flip over his hand and see a cluster of bright red, throbbing, bleeding cuts on his wrist all the way up to the inside of his elbow, blood trickling down into his hands and onto the floor.

I feel the tears welling up in my eyes. "D-Dan...why?" I ask trying to keep my voice steady and failing.

"I-I just f-feel sso useless. N-no one c-cares about m-me. I hhave you, b-but you j-just p-pity me." He looks away again, "Everything is just sso f-fucked up...not even m-my own p-parents ever l-loved me."

All I can do is stare at this broken boy in front of me, trying to keep it together for Dan's sake. "That is not true at all. I love you so much and I can't even explain to you how much I do. You are so special and it physically pains me that you can't see that. I know that people may have hurt you in the past, but as long as I'm around, no one will ever do anything to you again."

"B-but that's the p-problem! You are j-just t-too perfect! I just feel l-like you're always b-being so g-good to me and I c-can't protect y-you a-and I c-can't do all of th-the things f-for you th-that you do for m-me. I just...I can't Ph-Phil. I...I can't."

I then wrap him in a hug as he buries his head into my chest. Dan's now sobbing into my chest and making my shirt wet, but I don't care because the only thing that's important right now is that I have the love of my life cuddled up in my arms. "I know you won't believe me, but you are so beautiful and I love you so much its unfathomable how in love I am with you."

I hear a small sniffle before Dan looks up at me, his caramel eyes meeting my own blue ones. "I love you too." He says simply, but I know that those four words add up to a million and I just pull him in tighter and we stay like that for a while, before climbing back into my bed and entangling ourselves within each other's grasp.

(A/N)
Hi, so I know that this was a short chapter, but for anyone who reads this (probably not a lot) I will try to update a few times a week!
~Alyssa