Innocence (Ben Bruce)

Chapter 44

Authors note: this chapter will be rather long, if you don't mind.


Today was the day. Today was the day that I tagged along to go see the man I love, do his favorite thing in the world. And the best part: Free concert tickets. Oh. And Emily & Angel are going too.

I had everything. I had Water, Food, Money, Sunblock, chap stick, The tickets, Advil, Sun Glasses, My phone, My iPod, My booking, And my dignity.

I walked to my closet and threw on the first thing I saw; A pair of faded out blue shorts and a striped tank top. I put my backpack on and walked don't downstairs. I walked through the kitchen doors to find Ben holding 5 condoms while talking to Angel. Well.

"Um" I mumbled. Their heads snapped at me. Ben bit his bottom lip.
"So Ben" I Said "What are your gonna do with those condoms?" I asked walking to the fridge

"Well. I'm not going to use them on anyone but you, unless you want me to go in dry. Either way is fine" He smirked

I grabbed a water bottle and said "Nah. I rather use a condom. But for real, why the hell are you standing in my kitchen holding five?"

"Well, for the concert, I'm a person whose representing Trojan. We're giving out free condoms to everyone that comes though the Trojan tent, and yeah I was Telling Angel about it" He calmly said. I drank a gulp of water and put it in my bag. I turned around

"You better get some then" I smiled. He laughed and I walked out to the book room.

Emily was sitting on the love seat reading 'The Fault In Our Stars' By John green, and she was crying.

"Who died now?" I asked

"RACHEL THEY BOTH HAVE CANCER AND THE BOY IS SO CUTE TO THE GIRL AND THEY'RE BOTH IN LOVE AND BOTH DYING AND RACHEL THE BOOK CANT JUST END LIKE THAT" She yelled

"Relax. Inhale. Exhale. Breathe. Emily I know your in love with your book characters, I understand. But right now, you have to pull yourself together. Quit the bookworm act and bring the dark Emily out. Were about to go see our favorite bands. " I said

She wiped we eyes "Your right. lets go" She smiled

We walked out into the living room "BOOOYYSSS" We yelled in unison
"WERE LEAVING. IM IN THE CAR" I said. Ben and Angel came out of the kitchen, grabbed their stuff and walked out the door. we got in the car and drove.

~

Were we are is really sunny, but I mean really sunny. I had put on about 4 layers on sunscreen on. I had made Angel and Emily do the same. It was not my intention on getting burned.

Ben had already left for sound check and Emily Angel and I were sitting on a giant hill of grass by a stage looking at the set list.

"At what time does Asking Alexandria play?" I asked

"Um, 6:50" Emily said

"Okay read the set list to me" Angel said

"Okay um
•Bring Me the Horizon;11:50-12:40
•Yellowcard;12:50-1:40
•BlessTheFall;1:50-2:40
•Pierce The Veil;2:50-3:40
•Skillet;3:50-4:40
•NeverShoutNever;4:50-5:40
•Of Mice And Men;5:50-6:40
•Asking Alexandria; 6:50-7:40
And that's it" Emily said

"Okay, since we don't listen to Yellowcard we can eat around 12:55 and since we don't really listen to skillet either, we can eat then too" I sternly said

"Great idea" Angel said "Hey what time is it? We should go buy some merch" He suggested

"It's 11:30" I replied

Emily stood up "Then off to the merch tents!" She said walking downhill.

~

All three of us had bought matching sweaters that had an amperstamp (&) on it. Rachel and I had also gotten a tank top with a floral amperstamp on it too. It was just so beautiful.

We were standing in the crowd for Bring Me The Horizon. The crowd was full of chatter and anticipation. I was full of excitement and I couldn't wait any longer.

They walked on stage.
The crowd went silent.
And He spoke "Hey, Im Oli From Bring Me The Horizon and were gonna play Chelsea smile for you"
And they began.

The music was blasting, my heart was racing, and My feet were in the air.
I was singing along with my heart.
I looked to my left and Emily was lost in the music, I looked to my left and Angel had his arms up and was going along with the words.

Best feeling ever.

~

"Those 20 songs were AHH MAAHH ZZINNG" Angel said fabulously

"DUDE I GOT PUNCHED IN THE FACE" Emily said "IT FELT GREAT"

"Yeah well, IM HUNGRY" I yelled loudly. "Dude lets get a jumbo hot dog" I suggested. It was cheap and definitely enough food for the three of us, you know cause it's jumbo.

By now it was 1:10 and we had bought the hotdog and we were sitting on a table under a red tent.

"Oh shit I forgot the relish!" I Said. I stood up and walked to a small square table with mayo, relish, ketchup and mustard. I took hold of three cups and filled them with condiments. I went to walk back to the table when I bumbed into a hard body.

"Oh shit I'm so sorry" I said. I looked up to see a familiar face.

Brown eyes.
Brown hair.
Eye liner.

Samantha.

"Oh my god Samantha hey" I said smiling

"Hey Rachel" She smiled sweetly

"I didn't expect to see you here. Who'd you come with?" I asked

"I didn't expect to see you here either. And I came with my friend Rose but we got lost and I came to the Food court looking for her because she loves food but I haven't found her and I found you instead" She laughed

"Oh dude that sucks. But since your alone, you want to say with me? I have Emily and Angel sitting at a table waiting for me"

"I would love to" She smiled

~

We had talked about everything.
I had talked to her about Ben and I had told her every single detail.

Even Angel and Emily had talked to her about things. And in return, Samantha talked to us.

By now it was 1:50 and we were in the front of the crowd for BlessTheFall.

5 guys walked on stage and everything fell silent. Beau looked down at all four of us and smiled. I melted.

And they started playing.

My feet jumped, my arms pumped, and my heart thumped. My heart sang along and I was lost in the music.

Best feeling ever.

~

It was 2:55 and we were late for pierce the veil. We were practically running for them.

This would be happening if no one would of taken so long.

We were walking to the Pierce The Veil stage but Emily needed to pee. And then Angel. And then Samantha.
I didnt, so I decided to go to an Asking Alexandria merch tent close by just to look, and I supposedly got lost.

But whatever.

We were here now as thankfully, they weren't on stage yet. I had tried to make my way to the front, and I was able because I was small, but everyone else was lacking behind, and I couldn't just leave them.

So we made it to the middle, And that was okay.

Emily was talking about how Jaime was so cute, Samantha was ranting about how hot Mike was, Angel wouldn't stop talking about how he hoped to see Kellin Quinn, and I, I was just excited to see them all.

They walked on stage with mustaches and Mexican hats.

This is why I love them.

He spoke "Were Pierce The Veil, and we love you" And then He spoke "Hey Im Kellin Quinn and I'll be joining, if you don't mind" He smiled

I took a look at my left to see Angels eyes wide open with anticipation. I chuckled lowly to myself.

And they started strumming.
I knew this song by heart.
The chorus came along and

"IMAGINE LIVING LIKE A KING SOMEDAY A SINGLE NIGHT WITHOUT A GHOST IN THE WALLS AND IF THE BASS SHAKES THE EARTH UNDERGROUND, WELL START A NEW REVOLUTION NOW" The entire crowd sang in unison

All four of us were laughing and this, was the best feeling ever.

~

It was 4:00 and we we all sitting on a giant hill of grass by the main stage often concert. We were all eating ham and cheese sandwiches and talking a bunch of shit.

I looked down at my sandwich and went into deep thought about my life.

"Guys" I said. everyone's head turned up at me " I really love you guys, ya' know. You guys really do mean the world to me, And I'll never be able to thank you enough for everything you've done for me" I said thoughtfully.

I looked up at Emily
"Emily, my dear Bestfriend, you have been with me since forever. You have been with me through thick and thin, you have taken all the bullshit I have ever thrown at you an have just helped me get though it, You have never once left me side for even a single second, you have always given me the best advice you had and what you thought was right. And I love you with all my heart. Thank you" I said tearing up

I looked at Angel
"Angel, my other Bestfriend, you have been there since the very beginning. You were there when my dad left, When my mom left, When I came out, when I tried to kill myself, you were next to my side every time I needed you to be, as every other minute as well. I've put you through hell, and you have always bounced back smiling. You have helped me through everything and I can't thank you enough. I love you with everything I have and more" I said crying now

I looked at Samantha
"Samantha" I said laughing and wiping a tear "I know we don't know each other very well, But we do. But for the amount of time I've know you, I trust you so much, more than you will ever know. You listened to me when no one else was there with me, I poured my entire heart out to you, and instead of leaving me, you stayed. And your still here, and in front of me. Your a wonderful friend and I don't want to ever lose you" I said "I don't want to ever loose any of you. You guys mean the world to me" I smiled at them

"Honey, you never will loose any of us, we love you way too much to just give you up that easily" Emily said
"You know, she's right" Angel said "Your our baby, Rachel. We literally adore you and our lives would be different and meaningless without you in it"
"I agree with them" Samantha said
"You really do mean a whole lot to me for the time I've known you. And now, I can't imagine how it would be if I didn't know you at all" Samantha said

A tear rolled down my cheek.

"You three mean the world to me. And, we should get going, Never Shout Never starts in 10 minutes" I laughed

"Yes please!" Samantha urged.

We laughed and picked up our belongings. We packed our things and we were on our way.

~

4:51 and Samantha was jumping with excitement, literally.

He quietly walked on stage, his feet padding against the wood floor. He spoke into the microphone "Hi. Im Christopher Drew, You can call me Chris, and this is NeverShoutNever. I'm going to sing Cheater Cheater Bestfriend Eater for you" He smiled.

And he started playing the soft song.

Everyone in the crowd was humming along softly with a giant smile on their face.

My favorite part was coming along and I sang with my heart

"Rain Rain go away come again another day when I say it's okay to get a little health to play as every single time you make your way into my sheets the hours move to minutes, the days turn into weeks"

I felt so alive and happy, and this, was the best feeling ever.

~

It was 5:50 and all of us four literally could not wait any longer to see Of Mice and Men. I mean, I've met Alan and Austin, but I was just to excited to see my babies again.

We were at the front of the crowd and I wouldn't shut up about how good looking Austin Carlile was.

I looked up at the stage to see 5 guys walk on stage.

The crowd went wild.
They all smiled.
My heart melted.

Austin spoke into the microphone
"Hey guys. were Of Mice and Men, And were gonna play Second And Sebring" He said with a weak smile

"AUSTIN I LOVE YOU" Emily yelled
He turned around and looked down at her, then at me and smiled

"I love you too! And hey Rachel" He smiled. All heads in the crowd turned to me and I felt cool "Hey Austin" I giggled.

"ALAN, BABY I LOVE YOU" Samantha yelled. Alan looked down at her and smiled "I love you too, My beautiful girlfriend" He said smiling. Samantha blushed, everyone's head looked at her and she just did the jail pose.

My friends.

They all started playing and throughout the middle of the song, he started crying. This was a beautiful song about his mother.

The next couple of songs were great and people were crowd surfing and moshing. Then they started playing 'The Depths'.

Everything was going perfectly fine, we were all having fun, until some idiot decided to punch Angel in the face.

All music stopped, everyone looked up "HEY HEY. WHAT THE FUCK DUDE. WHY ARE YOU PUNCHING PEOPLE IN THE FACE. WHATS THE REASON FOR THAT. WHATS THE REASON TO HIT PEOPLE?" Austin yelled into the microphone at the guy who punched Angel

"He looks like a fag" The guy laughed "Look at him Austin. C'mon man be cool"

You could literally see the growing rage in Austin's face.

"ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME!? GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY CROWD DUDE. YOUR A DISGRACE TO ALL OF MY FANS. GET OUT OF MY CROWD. BULLIES ARE NOT REAL FANS. FUCK YOU GET OUT OF HERE" He yelled straining his voice

The guy backed away and ran off terrified. Angel was clutching his nose looking at Austin with tears in his eyes. "Rachel, is he with you?" He asked me. I nodded. "Angel" I mouthed

"Angel" He said softly. He walked to the front of the stage and hopped off. He walked to Angel. He turned off his microphone. "Hey look at me" He said softly. Angel looked up "Are you okay?" Austin asked

"Yeah, just a small nosebleed. Thank you for sticking up for me" Angel said

"Hey man, you know me, anytime. He was a jerk. He's a bully. I don't stand for that shit. You don't need to thank me" Austin Smiled

"I do. You stopped playing because of me. You shouldn't of done that" Angel said. Austin just stared at him. He turned on his microphone and spoke

"I'm talking to every single one of you, Do you guys care that I stopped playing to get the Jerk out of here? Because he punched my friend in the face. If you don't care CHEER FOR HIM" Austin yelled

The entire crowd cheered and yelled and Angel's face was just priceless.
"They're you go. They don't care either because they're real fans." Austin said. He said and hopped back on stage. He pointed at Angel "This ones for you" He said. And started playing 'This ones for you'.

And this is why Austin Carlile is my hero.

This was the best feeling in the world.

~

Well. It was finally 6:50 and I really wanted to see Ben.

Everyone in the crowd was tall and I couldn't see, I couldn't get through. People kept pushing and yelling. Everyone was a DickDouche here.

Fuck dude.

Asking Alexandria walked on stage and I smiled. Ben looked perfect.

Danny spoke into the microphone with his thick English accent "Were Asking Alexandria, and we fucking love you" And they started playing.

The crowd went wild instantly. Everyone started jumping and singing. soon enough a mosh put started and a giant circle.

Eventually, a little gap opened due to the mosh pit so I told everyone to grab hands and I took hold of Samantha's hand and move is a bit forward. It wasn't much but, It helped.

By now, it was 7:20 and they were on their last song. 'Not The American Average'.

Danny was bouncing all around the stage looking like a monkey and Ben was right by his side being a doofus.

Sooner or later Ben's solo came up and the crowd went silent. All eyes were on him.

He looked up at the crowd and somehow found me. He smiled and sang "One step late and I never told you that I can't take another disappointment. Breathing and gasping all lead to another messy ending. Breathing and gasping all lead to another messy ending." He smirked.

Oh my god.

He looked at me dead in the eye and they all sang "TEN INCH. With your back against the wall. with your face buried in the pillow!"

Oh Ben.

The song ended and Ben talked "Hey Danny, don't we have the best fans in the world?"

"He'll yeah we do"

"You know, I love every single one of them." Ben said biting his lip. I blushed slightly. Ben walked up to Danny and whispered something into his ear. He smiled and laughed and Ben went red.

Danny spoke into the microphone "I want every single one of you" He took a deep breath and put both of his hands in front of him "To form for a wall of death" And separated his hands away from each other "Right.FuckingNow"

Everyone shuffled to the sides. I got pulled to the right by Samantha because I was not gonna Be in this.

"Great Motherfuckers" Danny smirkingly laughed.

Ben spoke into the microphone "I love every single one of you motherfuckers. But there's someone else. Someone else I truly love. I've loved this person for who knows how long. And I just can't keep this from any of you any longer." He breathed "Rachel. Rachel Hernando. I know your out there. Baby come out to the middle" He asked.

Everything literally froze. I froze. My brain Froze. My heart froze. Ben you motherfucker.

I turned around to Emily
"Emily what the fuck there's too many people" I said frantically

"You'll be fine. You can do this"She replied

"Go out there and show everyone your his" Angel said

"Go on" Samantha said

Fuck.

I turned back around trying to figure this out and my feet somehow started moving to the middle.

I stood there. All eyes on me.

"Rachel" Ben laughingly smiled. I bit my lip and locked eyes with him.
"Everyone, I want you to meet the woman I love" He smiled.

Every.Single.Eye.Was.On.Me.

"Rachel I want to sing something to you." He said blushing

He looked at me in the eyes
"Oh, why you look so sad?
Tears are in your eyes
Come on and come to me now

Don't be ashamed to cry
Let me see you through
cause I've seen the dark side too

When the night falls on you
You don't know what to do
Nothing you confess
Could make me love you less

I'll stand by you
I'll stand by you
Won't let nobody hurt you
I'll stand by you

So if you're mad, get mad
Don't hold it all inside
Come on and talk to me now

Hey, what you got to hide?
I get angry too
Well I'm a lot like you

When you're standing at the crossroads
Don't know which path to choose
Let me come along
cause even if you're wrong

I'll stand by you
I'll stand by you
Won't let nobody hurt you
I'll stand by you
Take me in into your darkest hour
And I'll never desert you
I'll stand by you

And when...
When the night falls on you, baby
You're feeling all alone
You won't be on your own

I'll stand by you
I'll stand by you
Won't let nobody hurt you

I'll stand by you
Take me in, into your darkest hour
And I'll never desert you
I'll stand by you
I'll stand by you
Won't let nobody hurt you
I'll stand by you
and I'll never desert you
I'll stand by you
I'll stand by you
Won't let nobody hurt you
I'll stand by you

I'll stand by you" He sang.

Tears were in my eyes and I just felt so happy. I was literally speechless.

"Only one more song. Just one more" He begged. I had my hands covering mouth, and I nodded. He looked back up at Danny "Im sorry dude, It's just perfect" He looked back at me

"I slipped up, I fell down.
I laid there with my back against the ground.
I've reached out, all I found,
My own reflection floating up into the clouds.

You helped me out of my madness.
You pulled me out of my grave.

I'm alive,
Breathing deeper than I've ever breathed before,
And I owe it all to you.
I'm coming home.

I found my heart,
I thought was dead and gone,
Safely in your hands, and it will stay there forever.
You keep me up, you keep me up. You keep me sane.
You taught me love. You saved me.

You helped me out of my madness.
You pulled me out of my grave.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

I'm alive,
Breathing deeper than I've ever breathed before,
And I owe it all to you.
I'm coming home.
The distance can't haunt us anymore.
I'm coming home!
[x4]

I'm alive,
Breathing deeper than I've ever breathed before,
And I owe it all to you.
I'm coming home."

I was drowning in my feelings.

"With that said. You do understand that I love you, correct?"

I was still clutching my mouth. I bit my lip and nodded my head

"Good. With that understood..." He said. He hopped off the stage and walked forward "Rachel Hernando, My love, My everything, Will you be my girlfriend?" He asked

My heart melted and my shoulders dropped. Everyone in the crowd gasped. I looked to my left to see Samantha, Angel and Emily tearing up clutching each other. I looked back at Ben

"Ben.."I started. I was at a loss of words. He had caught me by surprise and I was surprised

"Rachel" He said again. I smiled

"Yes Ben yes. I will be your girlfriend" I said. He dropped the microphone and walked to me with this colossal smile plastered on his face. I ran to him and jumped in his arms. He twirled me around and I laughed not caring who was watching.

I could care less about my insecurities.
I could care less about my past.
I could care less about my parents.
I could care less about my scars.
I could care less about all the pain.
I could care less about anything.

All that matters right now, was him.

He put me down and kissed me hard. I looked into his beautiful hazel eyes and noticed he had tears in them.

"Rachel...Fuck. With that said, I only have one more question" He breathed. He looked at Emily and she nodded and smiled. He looked back into my eyes and took hold of my hands
"Rachel..I have never loved anyone like I've loved you. You are perfect. You are flawless. You are the most beautiful woman I've ever seen in my life. We have been through so much together, for the short time that I've known you. But I've never been sure about anyone in my life. You understand me. And I understand you.
I lost you once, and that is a pain I never want to endure again. You are a gem to me." He softly said. He reached into his back pocket and grabbed a petit red velvet box. My breath hitched in my throat and my heart stopped.
He looked into my eyes and got on one knee.

My jaw dropped and I covered my mouth with my hands.

I could not believe this was happening.
Thee Benjamin Paul Bruce was on one knee in front of hundreds of people.

He was.

"Ben..." I started

"I'm in love with you Rachel. I want to spend the rest of my life with you. Make me the happiest man In the world, Marry me?" He finally asked

I was at a loss of words. My heart was pounding and I have never felt like this before.

"Yes Ben. Yes I will Marry you. A million times yes" I practically yelled

He stood up and in a swift move he picked me up and twirled me in circles . I laughed like crazy and wrapped my legs around him to hold on for Dear life. He finally put me down and opened the box. I was in awe. The ring was gorgeous. He grabbed it and slipped it onto my ring finger. It fit perfectly. I loved it.

"Ben, it's beautiful" I smiled

"Your beautiful" He said. He grabbed my by my hips and kissed me, The crowd went wild and cheered. I laughed and looked back at Angel, Samantha and Emily. They were all crying and Emily had this smile on her face as if she knew this was going to happen. She probably did.

I looked back and the man I was engaged to, Wrapped my arms around his neck, and kissed him.

And this, was definitely the best feeling in the world.