Detriment

6. how much I love you...

"Ayden please...pl-please come and get me."

     My body felt numb from the combination of painkillers and the cold air that nipped at my skin while I stood at the bus stop. I was so tired. Physically and mentally. I couldn't take it anymore, I just couldn't take the pain.

     So I had left. It had been almost three in the morning when I had made sure that Cameron was fast asleep, before leaving the house. Briefly I had thought about going home with my mom but I didn't know how I would explain it. I didn't want her to know about any of it.

     That was when I had called Ayden, the only other person that even had the slightest clue about what was going on. He was half asleep when I had answered, but nevertheless, he had answered.

     "Charlie? Where are you?"

     "I'm at a bus stop, somewhere downtown. I-I'm not sure, there's a park in front of me." I slid down to the ground and hugged myself. Stupidly, I had left without a jacket, the only thing covering me from the cold was the thin shirt that I had grabbed in a hurry.

     "I'll be there, just stay where you are okay. I'll find you." He was coming. He was actually coming. The phone went dead but I still remained motionless, holding it up to my ear. Even with me pushing him away at the studio, he was still coming to get me. My breath formed a frosty fog as I exhaled, leaning my head back.

     The abuse this time was bad. Cameron had been angry from the kiss with Ayden to Bradley coming over and he had let it all out on me. Without the high dosage of painkillers that ran through my body, I would've probably been in more pain than I was actually experiencing. It was dull right now, enough relief for me to at least move. Pulling my knees in, I buried my face into my folded arms. It blocked out some of the cold.

     I'm not sure how long I actually sat there just thinking, but the sound of a car coming to a stop had made me look up. Ayden had stepped out of the car, leaving the engine on and rushing to get to me.

     His body was warm when he hugged me and his jacket smelled nice when it was wrapped over my trembling frame. He easily picked me up from the ground and into the heated car. As he started to drive, I pathetically curled into a ball. Ayden didn't talk, and I was grateful for that. I didn't want to talk about anything.

     Silently, though, I broke down. I had kept this facade up for so long, pretending that everything was okay and I was happy. Pretending that I was strong even through the pain. But I wasn't. Cameron couldn't begin to know how much he'd broke me. How, even in this car driving away from the house, terrified I was of him finding out that I had left. How difficult he made it for me to open up to someone about any of this. How I felt like I was losing myself. Death was a prayer now.

     It felt like hours had passed while in that car, but I knew it had only been minutes. It wasn't like Ayden lived far.

     "Charlie, we're here."

     Even after Ayden had spoken the words, I didn't make any attempts to get out of the car. I was perfectly fine with sleeping out here for the night, but knowing Ayden, he wouldn't let me.

     Ayden sighed and got out of the car. I was troubling him, I knew that much. Having to wake up in the early hours of the morning, only to pick up the singer that couldn't defend himself. That and he was uncooperative? I shook my head as Ayden opened my door. He reached for me but I jerked away from his touch.

     "I'm sorry. I can do it." I muttered and tried to get out past him. My movements were weak and I almost tripped out of the car.

     "Charlie, stop!" Ayden exclaimed, sounding alarmed. I didn't understand why. I ignored him, and tried to stand back up, but Ayden didn't allow me to, forcing me back in the car.