I don't feel like eating tonight although I don't usually eat, tonight my disgust for food has grown significantly so I sit on my bed and think about all the things that went wrong with my day but one obvious thought keeps throwing itself around the inside of my head. After my years of being an invisible soul drifting through the school hallways, someone finally noticed me.
Love isn't the only heavy four lettered word but hope has been added to my list.
I need patience to live my life, I am always under a constant urge to vent my pain and cry my eyes out. Anger is another constant that haunts me when I'm awake.
I loath everything around me and everyone gets on my nerves, and sometimes I find myself thinking that if I were to disappear the only person that would notice that I'm missing is my teacher, while marking the class register at school.
Today I feel as though things have changed for me, and I can't help but wonder if I needed this change in my life. Suddenly I feel like a complete opposite of my former self and I feel guilty as if I owe it to my former self to stay the same. My dark thoughts are interrupted by my sister knocking at the door. "Come in." I half yell, she struts in like a model and I have to bite my lip in order for me not to tell her that her walk is way too superficial. ( as if she doesn't know it. )
"Hey sis, I wanted to talk to you about something and please don't feel obliged to answer me because it's unlike me to ask for your opinion."
Her actions surprise me, and I can't help but wonder how bad her situation is if she actually needs my help? Opinion? Whatever it is.. It could be the worst thing that has ever happened.
"Who died?" I ask rather sarcastically. "If you don't wanna talk to me just say so okay?!" That's when I notice the tears in her usually clear eyes, although my bond with her is close to non-existent, I can't help but feel a wave of sadness wash over me. "Talk" I say dryly. " I had a very bad day today, I'll spare you the details. The real reason I'm talking to you now is to find out if I've ever done anything wrong to you." I'm taken back by her words and I take a few minutes to come back to my senses. I don't know whether to say yes or no so I go with "Not directly." My answer surprises her because her eyes widen a bit then go back to their normal size.
Then suddenly her voice increases in volume "So why do you think it's right for you to ruin my life and try to bring me down to your miserable level!" I find myself in a state of anger and confusion. I rarely talk to my sister so her words are completely foreign to me.
"What the hell are you talking about?" I counter. "You know what, f*ck you!" And with those words she storms out of the room leaving me boiling and confused.
So I decide to get an early night and hit the sack.
Nothing has ever been as confusing as my life in these last few days.
*** A/N ***
Hi guys .. I'm sorry for this update that took forever! I've been really caught up with a lot of stuff but it's holidays now I'll be updating more often
Don't forget to vote and add comments here and there .. I hope you enjoy the book
~ Chii
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Teen Fiction"What exists after Death?", I asked myself, the smell of death had become more and more apparent with each day that had come and gone within one breath. "Whatever it is, it can't be worse than living" I answered myself. I knew however that I had ans...
