Broken Soul l Julian Draxler

Month Ten

Month number ten with Jasmin was full of hurt and disappointment. You may ask why. And here is the answer.

This was normal day. At least I thought it was. I woke up, went to training, came back home and called Jasmine. Once. Twice. Five times more. Nothing but silent.
- Come on baby, pick up - I murmured. But she didn't.

Maybe she's just busy. I made myself a cup of tea and waited patiently for Ricardo because I was supposed to meet with him.
One hour later he came and we started play FIFA.
- So bro, how are you and Jasmin? - he asked.
- I'm so in love with her that words can't describe it - I smiled widely.
- Uuuuhhhu. Marriage? - she whistled.
- You know what? I was thinking about it last night. I think she's the one Ricardo. I love her so much. She's with me when I need her. Always. When I lose, when I win. When I cry and when I laugh. It's amazing to have somebody who support you and love you.
- Julian wow. You really love her - Ricardo grinned. - You're talking like women - then he laughed.
- Fuck you man - I thrown pillow at him. 
- I'm thinking about proposing for real and you're laughing at me!

Two hours later Ricardo left my apartment. I called Jasmin again but she still wasn't responding. So I went to her flat. I was knocking on the door for about 15 minutes. I started feeling scared. What If somebody hurt her again?
- For fake's sake open the damn door - I almost screamed.
- Mr. Draxler? - I heard voice behind me. Oh no, not fan. Not now, please.
- Yeah? - I saw older woman.
- Jasmine left a message for you - he handed me a paper. Left a message for you? What the...
- Thank you ma'am. - I said. I sat at the bench near to her flat and opened it.

Dear Julian!

I want you to know that I love you so much. I never loved anybody more than you. At that's why I left you. Yes, I did that. I'm really sory. I didn't meant to hurt you. And one day when you will have family and loving wife you will understand that it was right thing to do.
You probably asking yourself now why. And I will answer that question. I have problems. Problems with myself. I can't forget about that night when we met. This is still on my mind and you don't deserve to be with a person who isn't able to make you happy, make you feel good, loved. Because I can't do it anymore. I can't hide my problems from you. I did it for a long time but it was like living a lie. You deserve better Draxler.
Have you ever thought how it will be when everybody get to know the fact that I was raped? I don't want that. And you as a public person shouldn't be with woman like me.
Remember that I will always love you and I'm keeping my fingers crossed for you and your career. You're the best. This is all mine fault. I'm sorry one more time. But I thought that I will be able to live happily with you.

Be strong and never change Julian.

Forever yours, Jasmin...

***
Sorry for any mistakes and not regular chapters but I'm so busy right now with school and work.
Hope you'll like it. This is one of the most important chapters :)