He's The One [Billie Joe Armstrong Fanfic] (Book 2 of Not The One)

3) Dropping the D-bomb

ALIYAH'S POV
It's been about a week since Billie 'broke up' with me. Well, he didn't really break up with me cause techinically, we don't have a label.  I don't even know what we're supposed to be called!

Oh I know! Star-crossed lovers.
Yeah, that's probably it.

Anyways, it has been a little awkward for Billie and I since Adie kept on inviting me to spend the night at their place because they miss having me there.
Awwww, so sweet right?

She invited me over for dinner one night and I was lounging on their living room, snacking on a bowl of grapes I found on the kitchen counter. Billie was in the living room too, watching tv. He doesn't seem to pay much attention to whatever he's watching. I think he could also feel the tension in the room.

"Billie, Aliyah?" Adie called.

Billie and I sprung up from our seats. "Yeah?" We said in unison.

"Could you please chop the vegetables? I already laid them all out on the counter, thanks." She said then grabbed her car keys on a coffee table near us.
"I'll just buy a few stuff for dessert."

"Okay," Billie and I both said then she got out of the house, closing the door behind her.

I set down my bowl of grapes on the nearest table and grabbed about a handful of it. I walked to the kitchen, eating the grapes from my hand with Billie trailing behind me. I was about to pop a grape in my mouth when it fell on the floor. As I bent over to reach it, a force came from behind almost making me face-plant against the floorboards.

BILLIE'S POV
I heard Aliyah yelp as I accidentally bumped her backside.

"I-I'm sorry," I stammered. My hands instinctively flew to her ass. "You okay?"

Well, hello.
Looks like my hands miss these great....jui--

"Billie," Aliyah snapped. "I'm fine."

Damn right you are.
My hands immediately went to my sides like magnet to a metal.

She turned her back to me then proceeded to wash the vegtables. I grabbed a few for me to wash. We finished the entire job in silence. As we were cleaning up, I decided to break the awkward tension that hung in the air.
"You okay?"

"Yeah, why do you ask?" Aliyah asked seriously. Though I could sense that she was trying to make it sound casual.

"Nothing. You're just quiet, that's all." I bowed my head and continued to help her clean the counter. Still, Aliyah remained silent till we finished our work. I wanted to make the situation less weird for us so I attempted to start a conversation.
"So uhmm..." I cleared my throat. "Why didn't you go with Joey and Jakob today? They went swimming with Ethan."

"Told them I'll pass for now. I'm not really in the mood for swimming," she said then walked to the living room where she made herself comfortable on the sofa, grabbing her bowl of grapes.

I followed and sat next to her. "Is this too weird for you?"

"What's weird?"

"Us."

"No," she said with a mouthful of grapes. "Why? Do you think it's weird?"

"Not really," I lied. Apparently, she doesn't seem affected by what happened at all.
This is what she wanted after all, right? I don't know. Women are confusing as fuck.
"It just feels different – not being with you in that way anymore...for good now."

ALIYAH'S POV
'Mmm' was all I can say for now. I continued to eat my grapes slowly since they're running out. They're the only ones I could keep myself occupied with so that I wouldn't have an awkward dead air with Billie. Us not being together (in the same way permanently) honestly has been hard for me to accept. And I never imagined Billie breaking it off. It's surreal. Maybe he doesn't really like me anymore.
But he's trying to open up a conversation. He probably still cares.
Nah, it's the guilt talking.

"Is that why you didn't go swimming? Because of Ethan?" Billie asked.

"What?" I laughed a little. Looks like he's also been doing a lot of overthinking too.

"I-I-I thought you would...I don't know, feel...I-I don't know," he stammered.

"Feel what?" I pressed.

"Feel that you couldn't be with other guys yet because...we went different ways not long ago," he finally said.

"Oh, no." I assured him. "I just don't feel like it."

"Oh okay then," he chuckled nervously. "Just so you know, you could see other...guys....it's fine by me."

Okay so now it's fine by him for me to see other guys. Is he pushing me away??
I.am.so.infuriated.right.now.
Do people really need to have feelings? I don't want to feel anything.
Please let this stop. I can't take it any longer, my heart feels like it's about to implode.

BILLIE'S POV
I couldn't believe I was able to say that. Of course it's not okay! I'd still get jealous!
Why the hell did I say that?! Great, now she thinks that it's 'fine by me'. I hate myself. I hate myself. I hate myself.

"Okay," Aliyah said with an unconvincing smile.

Okay, she probably hates me now. I'm stupid and I'm sorry.
I wanted to take back everything that I said but I couldn't. I wouldn't even dare do that. I know that this time is gonna come sooner or later but I only made it happen a little too early. If I come running back to her arms, she'd probably hate me forever for thinking that I played with her emotions or whatever.

I tried to lighten up the mood so I said, "heard you got a little crush on Ethan."

ALIYAH'S POV
My cheeks flushed. "Uhh...yeah," I admitted.
I didn't ask how he knew about that. Either of the two boys told him.

"Why don't you go on a date with him sometime?"
Okay Billie, I don't need your help for me to move on.

"I'll think about it," I told him.

"Yeah, you could go on movie dates....eat somewhere nice...go on a picnic...go camping..."

Okay Billie, stop.

But he went on. "Go stargazing, ooh that's nice...roadtrips...hiking..."

Seriously Billie, stop.

"Sleepovers..." He joked on that part. "Watch the sun set...go on a walk...or, you could--"

"Okay dad!" I snapped. "I get it."

Billie's face fell. I don't know if it's because of the D-word or my tone.
...definitely both.

He was about to say something when the front door swung open. It was Adie.

I didn't talk to him throughout the entire night. Good thing he didn't say anything too.