I'll Go Down With You

Chapter 5

Kellin

"Allie, why?" I ask, my eyes filled with tears as I stare at her through the skype screen.

"I found someone else, Kellin. You've been gone for too long." She whispers. I stare at her, and that's when I see her new man. He kisses her, and she hangs up on me.

"Allie!!!" I scream, over and over, hoping for her to come back. She doesn't, and I stare at myself. I see all the flaws etched in my face, and I go for Jesse's pain medication bottle. I pull out six pills, and I take them one by one.

One......

"Kellin!!!" I hear screams in the distance, but I don't listen, and I take another one.

Two.......

"Kellin, get up!!!!!"

I cry as I open my mouth again to take another one.

Three.......

I hear sniffling.

Four.........

"Kellin, c'mon, get up!" I know it's her, but I don't listen, and my vision gets hazy.

Five........

I fall on the floor, unaware of everything. All I wanted to do was die. I didn't want to have to face that Allie was going to be with someone else.

Just as I put the last pill in my mouth, something touches my lips, and I wake up, in cold sweats. Allie looks at me, clearly trying to hold back tears, and the boys are all around me.

"Jesus, Kellin!" She yells, slapping my arm.

"You alright?" Gabe asks. I nod, even though I know I'm not. I could've sworn I was committing suicide. I could've sworn.

It's so silent, and I realize we're leaving today. I'm leaving Allie. I see that the boys are packed in some kind of way.

"C'mon, you have to leave in an hour." Allie says. She's trying to be strong and not watch me leave. I nod and get up. Allie's fully clothed, unlike last night,  and I look down at myself. Damn, I'm naked. I quickly put on some shorts, and everyone laughs quietly.

Allie steps out of the bus, but the windows are open, so I can wave.

"Close those, please." She requests.

"Why?" I ask weirdly.

"I don't want to see you sad, waving me goodbye. I want to see a smile, which you're going to give me." She says confidently. I nod, and I give her a long kiss until Gabe taps my shoulder. I step away, giving her a kiss on her forehead.

"You're going to be okay. We'll be okay, I promise. We'll be together, go through everything together, and go down together." She whispers as I walk to the bus. I step inside, but I don't close the door. She smiles weakly at me, and comes to the door.

"Kellin, you have to go...." She whispers. I still stand there, wanting to grasp her for another day. She starts to close the door, and I back up as she closes it.