Somebody's Kiss (TeacherxStudent) (GirlxGirl) (Lesbian) (SlowlyEditing)

Chapter 25

Kate's POV

Watching her lying in no good and seeing her suffering were enough to kill me. The terrorizing waves of fear washed over me. Harmonious melancholic sounds escaping in my breathe. She's spending her time sleeping in serenity but the truth couldn't take away from me that any minute soon was another trial of her survival.

I lay down myself at the couch, earlier's tension almost suffocate my veins, I convince Natasha not to worry so much, I tried to be strong in front of everyone when the reality is that I'm afraid too. I decided not to inform the Fairbairns, it is because I know that even they were worried they can't afford to fly back here and it'll only makes me disappointed and down cast. Sliding my fingers at the screen, wearing a fake mask of satisfaction. I called the squad and like what I feel, their feelings were full of heart sore. I couldn't even stomp my feet because every single steps away from her is like million miles of running.

I watch Natasha doing her work. Semestral break is coming, then after holidays will come soon line up. I'm silently hoping it wouldn't take any longer for Alex to wake up. I missed her presence, the way I annoy her.

Why something like this had to happen?

Finally Miles is in deep serene, I mean she was silent which is great because whenever she opened her mouth, it's all about, most of the time actually is nonsense.

Silently breathing, the talk with Natasha last time came up to my mind. I don't know what happened to me that time while talking with her, I can see in her deep blue eyes how much she cared for Alex but sadly she's so afraid. Everything for them were risky and difficult but my friend still tried what she think she can do just to pursue her. It's slowly killing me when I keep on saying and encouraging Natasha to finally tell everything with Alex, it seems my world has flipped over and over, I am killing my own self. But there's nothing I can do. They both secretly like each other, I'm more than happy knowing the feelings they both have were mutual even though it also means giving up what I felt, Alex was just always my fantasy, a dream that would never come to reality.

As I keep myself entertained by my phone, my mind has its own system to think and keep on wondering thoughts. It's hard to let the person you love happy with someone else, knowing you were not part of those smiles she had yet it's harder to keep pushing yourself with someone you love when you know both of you were suffering.

To Love is to Suffer..

To Love is to Sacrifice..

Two things I finally learn to understand, but you can't blame me for not moving on that easily. Because she is my everything.

She helped me mold myself and defined to me what really happiness means. How can I let go to someone who became a big figure of my life? How can I let her go when everytime I closed my eyes she's all that I see? How can I move on when everytime she's near the electric sensation of thousands volts were crawling to every nerves of me and it driving me insane? Why of all the person on earth why it has to be her, because she's human too and we were both close to each other. I never knew I'm going to be like this. I wish I know all the answers to my infinite questions about this stupid feelings.

I wish, I wish I never left her. I wish I made something different before.

I heard Natasha groaned, pulling me out of my thought so I asked in middle of nowhere exactly "So did I fail your history subject?"

She let a little laughters came out in her lips maybe to enlighten our silent and serious faces, although we're calm down for now, "Well, you did fail, almost. You're just lucky you have high quiz and exam result." She started to teased. I never imagined we were going to be closed like this, not real closed particularly but joking around was cool, getting comfortable.