I'm Not the Type of Girl

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I'm going to update as much as I can tonight to make it up to you for not updating.

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I'm not the type of girl

To want attention on myself

I'd much rather be alone

Than be surrounded by people

I'm not the type of girl

To hide underneath makeup

I just let it show

Because everyone knows my flaws

I'm not the type of girl

To walk around in slutty clothes

Because I'm very uncomfortable

With showing my body

I'm not the type of girl

To babble on and on

About nothing in particular

Because I like to just sit and observe

I'm not the type of girl

To give my heart away randomly

I know better than that

I don't trust easily

I'm not the type of girl

To flaunt myself in front of people

I sound like I goody-goody

But it's how I was raised

I'm not the type of girl

To go out much

Part of it's the internet

The other part is books

I'm not the type of girl

To show off talents

I want people to find out randomly

So they know it's worth something

I'm not the type of girl

To talk much

Because I think if I do talk

I annoy people

I'm not the type of girl

To really do sporty things

I'd much rather stay inside

And not get hurt

I'm not the type of girl

To show people my writing or drawings

Because I'm self-conscious as fuck

And I hate being critiqued

I'm not the type of girl

To open up to someone

The first time I meet them

I hate doing that

I'm not the type of girl

To live a little

I like to stay safe

And not show my scars

I'm not the type of girl

Who should want to commit suicide

But I do

And it's getting worse now

If I'm really all those things

Then why do I write

Why do I tell you my problems

I could be bothering you

I'm sorry

I'm not the type of girl

Who usually does that kind of thing

But I'm doing it now

So I'm sorry

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-Kat

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