*WARNING- INCLUDES DESCRIPTION OF CUTTING*
Dylan,
Let me describe cutting to you.
I feel awful, so I go up to my room, shut the door, and sit down. I grab my blade from where I hid it behind a box.
I take the blade and I drag the corner across my thigh, where I cut under my underwear so it isn't even visible during gym. I drag it acrid that spot repeatedly until I am satisfied with the amount of blood visible. I lick off the blade and hide it again. I press a Kleenex to my bleeding cuts and then throw out the bloody Kleenex. I always feel so much better. The weight is lifted
off of me.
I should've heeded the warnings.
Self harm is addicting, Dylan.
It really is addicting.
I hope you never have to go through this. I hope you never have to deal with this addiction. I hope it never gets that bad for you.
I know I am still human. The numbness is replaced by a slight pain, at least.
-J
