Colorful (Adopted by Emblem3)

Chapter 20: I'm trying too hard again

Song of the Chapter: Try Hard by 5 Seconds of Summer.

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Ryder's POV:

What am I supposed to tell him? What the hell do I do? I can't just say "oh yeah, I have an eating disorder." It's not that easy.

I mean, sure, I told Keaton. But, I trust him. Even then, when I couldn't trust anyone.

"I'm a picky eater." I lied.

He nodded, I could tell by his facial expression that he wasn't totally convinced though.

He brushed it off as we pulled into the small parking area.

We walked into the shop and the strong smell of barbeque sause hit, burning my nose.

"Wes!" The man behind the counter shouted.

"Rob!" Wes mocked, shaking the man's hand.

"Who's this you got with you?" The man, Rob, asked, refering to me.

"Drew's adopted daughter, Ryder." Wes said as Rob shook my hand.

"Aye, Ryder. I'm a friend of the guys. I live next door to you guys." He said, smiling.

Hey, this guy's not so bad.

Wes and Rob talked for a minute before, the order was handed to Wes. He grabbed the box and we walked out to the car.

We soon pulled into the driveway after the short drive. We got out and walked in with the wings.

Drew and Keaton ran up grabbing the big box and shoving a bunch onto their plates.

I grabbed three and sat down. I guess i can force these down.

"You're not hungry?" Drew asked.

I shook my head. I tried my best to eat, I really did.

Sometimes I think I try to hard. I try to please everyone when I really can't. Sometimes I think I should stop trying but, I can't because, I know what it's like to be hurt by someone you love. I just don't want to hurt these boys.

I ate two of the three wings, then I couldn't eat anymore.

Everyone finished and we cleaned up. I helped Drew with the dishes and went upstairs to shower.

"You start school tomorrow, so don't be up too late." Drew warned. Shit, I don't want to go but, what good does arguing do?

"Alright." I sighed, continuing up the stairs.

I put my phone onto the iHome, pressing shuffle. I undressed, and stepped under the warm water.

I cleaned my body, shampooing and conditioning my hair, three times. Stupid OCD.

I got out, wrapped my body into a towel, and blow dried my hair.

I went to my wardrobe, pulling on grey sweat pants, and a black tank.

I pulled my hair up into a messy bun, and sat down on the bed, pulling my laptop onto my lap. I logged onto tumblr and scrolled through, reblogging and liking posts.

I became bored with tumblr and sat my laptop back on the bed side table. I don't really want to go on twitter for a bit after what happened last time. I got a bunch of retweets and favorites, according to the notifications on my phone.

I turned off the fairy lights, layed down, and faded off to sleep.

"Ryder wake up." Drew whispered, shaking me lightly.

I groaned, sitting up and stretching.

"Why?" I asked, sleepily.

"You have school." He said, helping me out of bed.

"Ew." I mumbled and walked downstairs where a plate of food waited at the island for me.

I sat down and tried to eat as much as I could.

I ate a pancake, two pieces of toast, and a sausage patty.

I took my medication, with Drew's supervision. He doesn't completely trust me with 4 bottles of pills.

I went upstairs to get ready. I put my phone on the iHome, and pressed shuffle as I will always love you by Whitney Houston came on. Great, now it's going to be stuck in my head all day.

I showered, as quickly as possible. I noticed my razor was back in the shower, I guess Drew trusts me. I shaved my legs and under-arms. I got out, dried my body and blow dried my hair.

I went to my wardrobe, deciding on what to wear. I pulled on a dark red, slightly over-sized, sweater and light-washed denim shorts. I know what you're thinking, 'Ryder, why in the hell are you wearing a sweater in August?' Well, I really don't feel like having people see my cuts. Especially, on the first day.

I pulled on my grey vans and went back to the bathroom to fix my hair. I left my hair down, and at it's natural curls.

I slid my phone into my pocket jogged downstairs, with my bag that had all my books and shit.

"You ready, Ryder?" Drew asked, grabbing his keys.

"Yeah." I said.

Wes hugged me really tight and handed me $5 for lunch or whatever else.

Keaton hugged me, telling me to have a good day and all that good stuff.

Drew made Wes take a picture of him and I, so that he'll always have the memory for when I grow up.

We walked out and into the car and got in.

To hell we go.

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I JUST FEEL LIKE I SHOULD SAY THIS, IDK WHY, RYDER WEARS BRAS AND UNDERWEAR. I JUST THINK IT'S AWKWARD TO DESCRIBE IT.

BUT, THEN AGAIN I WRITE SMUT BUT, WHATEVER.