You Would Never Understand (AkuRoku)

Chapter 11

Chapter 11
Hey Guys! Ahh hopefully some conflict will be solved finally!

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Roxas turned to the window to stray away from the sight of Axel; he felt no relief though as the when it showed his own reflection. It was something he just didn't want to look at, something he openly refused to look at when he closed his eyes. Roxas, he just didn't know who he was mad at, when he tried to organize the feelings that were jumbled inside him; it just got him even more anxious. He squeezed his eyes shut, concentrating on any base of emotion he felt, thinking he could build off that. He was angry, that's for sure, and at whom though, that wasn't so clear. He was mad at himself for running off and worrying his friends and not being on guard at the party, letting himself get into that situation. Another part though, the spiteful part, it blamed everything on Axel, it blamed him for throwing him in the pool, it blamed him for messing up what little balance he had, he blamed him for his confused emotions, and most of all he blamed him for not allowing him to be alone so he could wallow around for a few days. It was Axel's fault he wasn't able to figure any of this out, it felt weird not being left alone y'know?

Axel's gaze flickered back and forth between Roxas and the street that was just about bare at this hour besides the occasional car full of idiot drunk teenagers. He tried to pay attention to the road but found trouble doing this when the small blonde looked so distraught. The redhead winced when he saw Roxas' reaction to his reflection; his face had scrunched up before the cobalt eyes immediately were shut tightly. Axel's mind drifted off nervously to what was going to happen when they got to his room. He hadn't exactly thought it through well enough to decide what he was going to say to Roxas, and he didn't really want to flip the 'Unfilter' switch in his brain to make it where words were spilling out of his mouth like had a screw loose in his jaw. Yeah, who knows what'd he'd say if he did that, he'd probably scare the blonde boy right back into his home. He chastised himself silently, he should've come up with a plan before he just jumped up and drove away. Axel groaned inwardly, he knew he wasn't good about thinking ahead, but still he wished we would've had enough common sense to think more so he wouldn't screw this up. He tried to sort of make an outline of what he wanted to say in his mind, sort of like how his RELA teachers asked him to do that before writing a paper, which wasn't ever what he did either.

When they pulled up Axel put a long, skinny finger to his mouth; indicating that they needed to be quiet, he felt the urge to wink at the blonde but felt it was unnecessary for how on edge their relationship was at the moment. Roxas looked at the house; it sort of took on a foreign appearance to him, as if he was seeing things in a new perspective. He sort of saw Axel's place like somewhere to be careful in, almost as if when he got in there and he stepped on the wrong place, a mine would blow under his feet; maybe that mine was his sanity that was suspended by a single thread. Yeah, that's probably what it was, but Roxas wasn't sure if Axel expected him to feel this way. He wondered if Axel could sense how he felt, how nervous he was, how scared he was, and how he could feel his stomach sort of drop farther and farther as he kept thinking. Nah, he was probably just over thinking this; that's what he thought at least until he felt the passenger door click open, and he jumped very noticeably, enough to the point where he bumped his head into the ceiling. He looked back at the reason for his fright, he was met with a very tall skinny redhead at the edge of the door with his arm out, and politely motioning for Roxas to step out of the car like a door man would, with a grin on his face. Roxas did so stepping back after stepping out, making sure to be not too close Axel when the taller boy shut the door.

The concrete felt rough against the bottoms of his feet, it scratched, leaving surface marks and indenting its path. The evidence would be there for a little while, though he would forget everything about this one moment and feeling in a short amount of time. He wished everything was like that, if only he could just not be tainted with any memories, live freely in the present; that'd be nice.