Twenty Øne Piløts Imagines

Voices•joshler

Addict with a pen could mess your mind up so bad you end up writing this...

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Tyler's POV

When the time comes... For you to realize your life was a lie... It will hit you hard. What you thought was there was never really there. What you believe in never helped you. What you thought and saw was just an illusion, a mind game you were playing on yourself. Once reality shows up and shows you what's really happening it isn't that happiest thing for you. For me... My whole life went down. It crashed down and no one could do anything about it. To this day I still think... Was he ever really happy?  Where the voices always their telling him how to feel, how to act? We're either of us really happy or was it just an act we used on each other? I loved him. He was... He was my best friend. My brother. My world. The only person in the world that I needed. I felt like we were suppose to be together, suppose to go through everything together, constantly be next to each other from our worst moments to our best. But that all was a lie and what I believed in helped me show... Show that not even the most powerful God could give you what you want when you ask. I... I just want to understand. Understand why he had to put me with this person but take him away later on.

Josh is dead. He's not dead and buried in a coffin, no, I don't think I would be able to live with myself if that happened. But he's dead... Dead inside. Everything got to him from the voices to the people around him. People telling him to kill himself and the voices in his head telling him to agree with those people because he knows it would make them happy. I tried to help Josh. I really did, I've been through it but some how I beat this negative voice in my head. Josh is going through a hard time. Worst than I did. The voice told me to kill myself to make everyone happy but the people around me told me to not listen because they loved me, they knew I would succeed in life and face what I was afraid of. Josh... He's a different story. He can't take it and it makes me feel horrible that I can't be the person to help him. He's tried to kill his self a few times but the most I've done is stop him. I don't want to stop him... I want him to stop himself. I want him to realize he's more than what he thinks. There are mean horrible people out their but I don't want him to believe them, I want him to look at those people that support him and will still love him even when he messes up. I want him to know I'm trying to help him but every time I try to just pushing me off. He said he didn't need my help. He didn't need anyone's help. I know he does, we all know he does, he just doesn't want it...