Fighting You ✔

E X T R A | Embarrassing Tales pt 2

{Pic of Willow. Not Edited}

Song: I hate you, I love you

Artist (s): Gnash ft Olivia O'Brien

Your first breath, took ours away.

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Do you remember - not long ago - when we shared Noah's most embarrassing stories as a kid? Well now it's the time to do the same to Willow. Welcome to embarrassing tale - Willow edition. (A/N: Willow is their daughter. Read the sequel Princess Undercover for more)

Embarrassing Tale #1

When Willow was three years old, she was told to pee in a cup in the Doctors office. She unexpectedly got nervous. In a shaking voice, she asked. "Do I have to drink it?"

Embarrassing Tale #2

Again at the age of three, Willow and I were at a bank when a young girl walked in. She had obviously been to the gym due to her tight fitted hot pink spandex attire and had quite round features and upturned button nose. Willow started clapping and screaming "Look mummy, a pig, oink oink, a big pink pig, oink oink." I felt terrible! I apologised and quickly ran out for the very busy bank.

Embarrassing Tale #3

Once Willow told the checkout lady at the video store that she was going to grow a penis just like her daddy when she got older. To preface this earlier in the day she had walked in while Dylan was peeing. I turned all kinds of red and the lady just said, that's nice sweetheart!!!

Embarrassing Tale #4

Once Willow decided to strip completely naked, nappy and all, in the shop when I had my back turned for about five seconds. I only became aware when a lovely lady tapped me on my shoulder and whispered into my ear, "Excuse me, love, your child is dancing naked beside the potatoes."

Embarrassing Tale #5

We were waited in A&E with my 3-year-old Willow along with Noah after he swallowed a broken
thumbtack. Noah and I were called in so I left Willow with Dylan. Not soon after he needed to pee and had to take Willow with him into the small toilet beside the waiting room. He was mid-stream and she shouts out in her best voice, "Daddy, your willy is SOOOOOO big." Everyone in the packed waiting room heard him and the rest of the wait was pretty awkward. I nearly died of embarrassment."

Embarrassing Tale #6

Once we invited a couple from work over to our house for the first time, to watch a Bears game. At the time Willow was 3 or 4, and would refer to the teams by their jersey colour. Well, that day they were playing the Falcons, and the Bears were in white. A few minutes into the game, Willow wanders up to me and quietly asks, "Which one is Bears?" I told her it was the white team. To which she then shouts out, "Yeah, we cheer for the white guys, because we don't like black guys, right, Mommy?" I had to awkwardly say, "Yes, the Falcons are wearing black, and today we do not like them because they're against the Bears." Everyone laughed a bit, but there were some side glances.

Embarrassing Tale #7

Willow and I were In the toilets at a local supermarket. Mother Nature was paying her visit. Willow came with me. A few minutes later she went running out of the toilet to announce to her grandma, and the rest of the supermarket, that "My mummy has a piece of string hanging out of her bum."

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That's all the tales we have for Willow, but I would be lying if I said that Dylan and I didn't have any. Do you want to hear some? Well here you go.

Embarrassing Tale #1

While I was in the hospital recovering from the - you know what - incident., I was on some pretty wicked pain medications, which made me quite loopy to say the least. Dylan allowed some kids from school to come over. A boy came along with his girlfriend, whom I had never met, stopped by to visit. I was a bit uncomfortable to be lying there in just a hospital gown, so I decided to cover myself. I went to grab the sheet, but grabbed the backless hospital gown instead and pulled it right up to my neck. There I am laying in all of my naked glory, clutching the hospital gown tightly to my neck with a big stupid grin on my face. Dylan was desperately trying to pull the gown back down, I was wondering why he would try to do such a thing, so I held on even tighter while slapping him with my free hand. The next thing I heard, was the boys girlfriend say "Oh my god, she flashed us!" In my drug induced haze, I didn't catch the meaning of what she had said until Dylan threw himself on top of me and said, "Babe, you have to let go of the nightie so I can cover you up."

Embarrassing Tale #2

I was in charge of capturing Beth's wedding on video. The ceremony started and just as they were announced as husband and wife, I realized I'd forgotten to push record! They had to repeat the vows all over again so I could get a video ... Oops.

Embarrassing Tale #3

I was giving Dylan his 'birthday gift' at midnight when his parents walked in with a birthday cake for him. They cancelled the party, and I wasn't allowed back.

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{A/N: Well, Surpriseee. I hope you liked this and I hope I made you laugh. Also my prom is tomorrow yet here I am updating for you guys. Anyway please don't forget to...

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lots of Love - Me}