ocean eyes

xlvi

"hajime," oikawa whispered, walking over to him. he sat down on the bed next to him, taking his hands. "hajime-"

"i could feel it," he whispered. "it's weird. i can feel it."

"what?"

"i can feel that i'm dying."

oikawa bit his lip, close to drawing blood, pressing his lips against iwaizumi's hands after, cupping them together in his own.

"thank you so much, hajime. for these seventeen years," he whispered. "for staying strong."

"no, thank you," he replied. "for lying next to me. for kissing my bruises. for stopping my nosebleeds. for catching me when i fainted. for giving me the experiences i couldn't have without you. for reading me to sleep and for holding me when i was at my absolute worst." he looked down. "could you hold me now?"

"yes, yes, of course," oikawa replied, gently lifting him up. he maneuvered iwaizumi's legs on either side of him as he settled him in his lap, arms around him to hold him up. iwaizumi hugged him back.

neither really wanted to speak.

"this is how i want to go," iwaizumi whispered. "i would've preferred it about seventy years later, but if i do go, this is fine. this is okay."

"i'm going to miss you," oikawa whispered, clutching on to iwaizumi's t-shirt. "but i'm going to stay strong. for you."

don't cry, he willed himself. please don't cry. not now.

"thank you," he whispered. "i love you, tooru."

"i love you too," oikawa whispered, pressing a kiss against iwaizumi's lips. "i'll always love you, hajime."

iwaizumi smiled as he placed his head on his shoulder, his soft breath against oikawa's neck, as oikawa whispered over and over again how much he loved him, breathing in iwaizumi's scent, holding him close.

he felt his breathing slow down. he didn't stop. he continued to whisper how much he loved him. 

his breathing stopped. oikawa continued.

he wouldn't let go.

after ten minutes, he finally let himself cry. he cried into iwaizumi's shoulder, his limp body the only thing that was left of him.

"i love you, hajime," he cried. "i love you so much."

"thank you for letting me love you."

"i'll never forget you."

the sun broke through the clouds and oikawa held on to him. the sun never stopped shining and even though iwaizumi did, oikawa's love for him would never cease to exist.