Phan One Shots

The Hardest Part Is Forgetting Those You Swore You Would Never Forget

✻The Hardest Part Is Forgetting Those You Swore You Would Never Forget✻

Lyrics:
You see love's a funny thing the way it lingers in the mind
No matter what you do or the passing of time
That ember still glows for those lovers behind
No matter if it's well remembered
That light still shines

Story:

Dan and Phil used to date. They met back in 2009 and developed a relationship which led them to move in together. They shared two apartments throughout the years; one in Manchester and one in London. The relationship lasted until last winter in 2015. They were so madly in love with each other but one day, it took a turn. Neither of them new exactly what had happened but the relationship didn't seem to work anymore. It wasn't affectionate. There were fewer kisses and the I love you's were infrequently.

At first when they noticed the changes, they tried their hardest to make it work. They went out on dates every weekend. They tried having more sex to be closer and more intimate but it didn't feel right anymore. Sure, it felt good but it wasn't romantic as it used to be. They used to enjoy it very much because they admired each other's physical beauty. Sex just turned into a quick fuck and led to bed right after; backs facing each other.

Their fans had also noticed how they were becoming more distant with each other. They knew about the lovable relationship they had before. Even when living together, they didn't collaborate with each other in their videos as often. Their gaming channel was quite inactive as well. When they did decide to post it wasn't as funny and entertaining anymore. It was mostly them recording themselves quietly playing a game and not making much eye contact with each other.

One day they were sitting on the couch in the lounge; both completely ignoring each other. Dan was on his laptop and Phil was watching an anime. Even with the tv on there was a painful silence. Phil sighed and decided it was time for a chat. He paused the show and turned over to Dan.

"Dan?" He interrupted his late night tumblr scrolling.

"Yeah?"

"We need to talk." Dan saw this coming. He new it was necessary but he couldn't bring himself to do it himself.

"Yeah, I agree." He shut down his computer and stared back at Phil.

"As you can see, you and I both know this is not working out anymore. We both tried so hard to fix this relationship and build it back up but we know we can't. I don't know what happened between us."

"I just don't love you like that anymore, Phil." Phil's heart ached. He felt the same too but hearing it come out of his mouth hurt him so much.

"I understand." He whispered quietly; tears threatening to spill.

"What are we going to do?" Dan asked shyly.

"I think it would be best if one of us moved out. I would go back with my parents for a while before I can get a new apartment. I assume you'll probably end up leaving as well since you can't pay for all of this yourself."

"Yeah, that's true." It was quiet again.

"Dan, I hope we stay in touch. I don't want this break up to ruin our friendship. I still care about you. I still love you, just not romantically." Dan's heart also ached. He didn't want to hear those words come out of his mouth, even if they were true.

"Of course, Phil. We can't let this friendship go to waste." They both got up and hugged, holding each other as close as possible one more time.

"Phil?" Dan asked a bit scared before he asked his next question.

"Yeah?" Phil mumbled; his face in the crook of Dan's neck.

"Do you think we could kiss one last time before this is officially over?" He was scared of Phil's rejection.

"Of course." Phil pulled back from the hug slightly; just enough to meet face to face with Dan. He looked at him straight in the eyes. You could see the pain in his eyes. Not necessarily because it was over, but because he was going to miss the fun memories they had together. Phil leaned in slowly and kissed him for the first time in what felt like months. Even as their last kiss, it still didn't feel the same. They both knew. Dan chuckled. "That didn't feel like I thought it would." Phil laughed at his comment. "Agreed."

After a couple of weeks Phil had finished packing. It took them longer than expected because it was difficult to figure out who kept what. They shared so many things. They had to organize everything and it took them a while to come to conclusions. All of Phil's belongings were packed in boxes and loaded into his parents' truck that was parked outside. His parents were patiently waiting for Phil to say his final goodbye's to Dan.

"I guess this is goodbye."

"I guess so." They pulled each other into a tighter hug than the one when they had the talk. They hugged for a while and when they pulled back, they were both crying.

"Why are we crying? We both agreed with this." Phil laughed.

"I think even though the feelings are gone, we're still going to miss each other. I mean, we were together for almost six years. It's going to be weird not living with each other anymore." Dan said smiling sadly at the crying Phil in front of him.

"I agree. Well, I should get going now."

"Alright. Remember to call Phil. Please don't forget about me." Dan said sadly.

"I can't, even if I tried." And with one last hug, Phil was gone.

Dan walked back inside and started crying. He was going to miss Phil so much. He saved him from himself years ago and plenty of other times throughout the years. Dan was having second thoughts about this. Part of him wanted to chase after Phil and try even harder to make it work but he knew it was no use. There's no point in fixing something that's no longer there.

It has been years since they both moved out. Phil was happily married, and so was Dan. It took them both a while to find someone again. They were both picky about dating people because it never seemed right. Dan tried to find someone but no one compared to Phil. The same went with Phil. No one was as amazing as Dan but they both found a way around.

They kept in touch. Always updated each other on their personal lives. They got together every Sunday for lunch and caught up with their weeks. When they are together, they both feel something in their heart. They know it's not romantic but whenever they see each other, they see their memories. They see their past relationship and can't help but smile. Their relationship was a light that led them through the darkest places.

That light still shines.

(A/n short story! I wrote this all in one night. I finished this at 3:34am. Thanks for reading! If I made you cry, please tell me.)