Two Sides Of The Same Coin

His presence

Feeling the breeze in the air, I glared at the beauty of the ocean. The blue, cozy, river flowing each second as wind passes by. It is as if the flow of the river parallels with our minds, sharing every thoughts and feelings, as our bond is connected internally and spiritually. I noticed the leaves falling every now and then, representing each death slipping away by Allah (swt). Damn, life is so short, I sneered at the fact of my own life. Sometimes I feel like I'm not ready to face this trial, it is scary to know that our lives are based on our actions to determine if we enter paradise or hell. I glanced around, hoping to shake all the depressing thoughts out of my mind. What caught my eye, surprisingly is the little girl. She reminds a mini version of me.. She pointed her finger towards the left side and led me towards another mysterious path, which I never heard or seen of. It's late evening and I'm still strolling around the pathway, looking for signs or anything in fact to relieve my pounding heart full of fear. The little girl is just pointing away and disappearing every two seconds, is she a ghost, a jinn or an evil spirit? I wonder! Then we came to a stop, arrived to our destination and we listened every words and saw every action discreetly and silently. I shook my head in disbelief and shouted "NOOOOO! Maaaaaaa, I don't want to lose you, come back, please, for my sake, come back!" Still no answer, her lifeless body stood still, as the little girl collapsed into her feet, crawling towards her mothers body, burying her head in her shoulders, sleeping away.

I woke up in fear, tears strolling down my cheeks, despite the annoying alarm that forced me to get out of this nightmare. Alhamdulillah, I would not have woken up if it wasn't for this alarm clock. By the time I decided to get out of bed, a phone call has been trying to reach out to me for an hour. Oh shizzle, my life is over, the time!! Omg how can I sleep for that long. After neglecting his many calls, I finally answered, "Naggy boo boo, you awake yet, you know you're late for school, get your ass out of bed and hurry up! Toodles." I scowled, "my ass? What about yours that has a bubble butt, no wonder your ass looks like a camel head when you walk." Knowing Saf, his female voice weeped, "ouch, that hurts! But seriously though, love your mean ass comments and I lobeeeee youuuuuu." Appalled and outraged, I retorted, "ew cringeeee, you know how much I hate affection." "Hehe mwaaaaah babes, see ya in a few!"

"Naaaargiiiiiissssss, niche ah, nashta kar." (Nargis, come down, have breakfast) I moaned after hearing her voice, knowing her care for me is real more than my blood father and his wicked wife. "Haireh bua, aap nahi sudrenge, mein ab late ho jaunga." (Oh aunty, you won't change, I'm getting late.) Defeated, bua asked, "beta, where is your brother?" I grinned at the thought of my half brother. "He's probably flirting with girls on his Xbox, you know how he is, he is the real MVP player you know. I winked at her, hoping to get the same reaction but instead she punched me. "Ouch buaa!!? Why do this to me?? I'm innocent", I gave her my usual pout face and alas, she gave in, she had to one way or another. "Okay I need to go, bye, love you and Allah Hafiz." I gave her a hug and waved, and she responded with "take care my jaan." At that moment, I felt I've been blessed of having a figure for protection, comfort and love, but I still miss the presence of my mother, no one can replace her, yet the hatred I've been enduring, the pain I've been suffering, who can relieve me from my pain? A question that can never be answered.

"Naggyyyy, there you are" I sighed, "eurgh you, why don't you ever leave me alone man, no one wants you." He pushed my locker and jumped up and down singing, "I'm so good for you, good for you uh uh." I laughed then squeezed his cheeks really hard enough for him to shed tears out of happiness. We walked to our third lesson after break, when out of nowhere, everyone stopped, all moving to one side, and stared at once with wide eyes. A shadow appeared of a tall guy, perhaps 6ft, built and toned, with huge arm muscles, hoping to impress all the crazy girls out here but he won't fool me, not at all. All the girls winked, screamed and sighed in one big hum as a way to get his attention, but nevertheless failed. His looks definitely made a big difference to all the girls in our school. Yet his presence, somewhat affected me, as he walked with his back straight and his chest in, his each steps is intimidating, signifying a sense of uneasiness to the outside world and, to me personally. When he came closer to my side, I tried to lower my gaze but my eyes were still as ice. Until now, as our glances met, I could not help but give in to his demands through our eyes whilst my physical strength is slowly losing spirit all at once. His eyes are full of secrets, dark and daunting, his eyes can make one crumple into pieces, who is this guy, what does he want and why is he making me feel so frail and weak? Stay away from him, and never give in to his temptation, my conscience warned. I shook these thoughts away and fled away from the scene into the dark hallway, avoiding his presence.