You Can't Fight Fate

Chapter 10

"What the hell are we doing?" Nick finally asked, in an exasperated breath, as he lifted himself off of me. "You're married. We shouldn't be doing this." He got off of me, entirely, then sat on the edge of the couch. He reached for his tshirt, glancing in my direction as he did, then he put it on, stood up & shook his head. 

I sat up, slowly, pulling my shirt over my head, quickly. "You're right. I don't know what came over me."

"The same thing that came over you two years ago." Nick replied, sounding bitter. "Alcohol."

"Nick, I felt a connection with us the moment you got in my car that night. I felt a pull toward you all night & that's what I acted on two years ago & that's what I acted on tonight. If I was sober, I would have done the same thing. I've never had this kind of gravitation toward someone before. Not that strong anyway. It's like... It feels like there's a higher power pushing us together. I can't explain it. That's just what it feels like to me." I stood up & then the guilt hit me, as tears filled my eyes. "What am I doing? Oh my God. My husband is at home dying & I'm making out with another man. What the fuck is wrong with me? I'm such a horrible person." I put my hands up to cover my face & I let out a sob. 

Nick came to me because a moment later, I felt his arms around me. "Demi, don't be so hard on yourself. There is something pushing us together. I feel it too. You can't fight fate."

I lifted my head to look at him, my mouth contorted, with the realization that just hit me. My hand covered my mouth & I shook my head. "No. I don't want to think that." I turned from Nick, still shaking my head like that would help me stop hurting.

"Why not?"

I whirled around to face him, my eyes wild. "Because I feel guilty? I feel guilty because fate wants you & me together, so badly, that it's making my husband die! That's what this feels like. Like he has to die because the universe wants us together. That is all kinds of fucked up. Don't you think?"  

Nick chewed on his lower lip, his arms crossing on his chest. He looked down at the floor, a scowl prominent on his face. "When you put it like that, yea, it's a little fucked up. Maybe even a lot fucked up. And I am not the kind of guy who is going to sit around & wait for a man to die, so I can be with his woman." Nick started shaking his head. "We need to move on. We need to stop this before it goes any farther."

I nodded my head, slowly, not totally wanting to stop, what was going on with us, but knowing that I needed to stop it. It was the right thing to do. "Yes. We'll be friends. Nothing more."

"Nothing more." Nick responded, almost robotically. I watched him, looking like he wasn't sure this was what he really wanted, either. Then he closed his eyes & took a breath before opening them to look at me. "I should go to bed." He pointed over his shoulder with his thumb. "Or... you should take my bed & I'll sleep on the couch."

"No, I can sleep on the couch." I shook my head. 

"Come on, Demi. Don't make me look like a douche. You take the bed."

I sighed & laughed at the same time. "Fine." I walked toward him & he showed me to his room. I looked around, loving how manly his room was decorated, especially with little space. His bed was neatly made & I felt warm, thinking of him in that bed with me. I took in a deep breath as I walked into the room & sat on the bed. "It's very comfy." I smiled as I bounced on it. Nick smiled back, looking down at the floor. "Big, too. You could sleep in here, with me, since Joe will be back & want the couch."

Nick clicked his tongue, then smiled, almost laughing. "You... "