Unheard

Chapter 12

Tiahli's POV

His smile - well that was it. That was the reason I could let go of him. Elijah taught me how to love. Who ever knew that Tiahli Rickets, red haired cheerleader can fall in love?

I knew he didn't say anything about breaking up but I knew the day is going to come soon. I wanted to be mentally prepared when it does come. Mauryn filled me in with everything while I was gone. I knew he gave special attention to Evangeline.  Something he hadn't done ever since him and I got together.

Tears started welling up as I made my way to the convenience. I could not break down in front of him. I would not dare to because I know it will break him. I guess, that's what love is. Putting his needs before mine. He needed me to be strong, so that's what he will get. A strong friend.

A faint smile appeared despite the tears as I reminisced our time together.

~

"Hey! No no! Not my hair!" I screamed as the custard flew onto my hair.

He pouted, "Well, too late for that, hahaha!"

"Oh no, you just did not."

"Oh baby, but I just did," he winked as he threw another bowl of custard, this time it landed on my thighs.

Running as fast as I could, I jumped onto him in a tackle. "Hey stop. Stop!" He screamed laughing as I started tickling his sides.

Suddenly our eyes locked and my hands grew weak.

"Gotcha," he said as he quickly planted a kiss on my cheeks and suddenly I was back in the present, in the reality.

And the reality was that I was in love with Elijah but I could never tell him. Tears made their way down my cheeks. With the excruciating pain I felt in my chest, I let out a huge sob to contain it.

"Hey there, are you okay?" I glanced at the door from where I heard the knock and the voice. It was really calm and somewhat soothing. However it sounded like the person had done her share of crying.

"Yes.. " I was surprised at how vulnerable and weak I sounded. This wasn't me. I hadn't heard myself cry before, maybe because I had never had it the hard way. I had never known struggle and pain. Unlimited amount of happiness wasn't on my list anymore. As TFIOS'a taught me, pain demands to be felt.

"I don't think so. Listen, I can help you," the voice spoke up.

"No, it's just the same old regular girl stuff y'know. I will be fine," I sighed. I was reassuring the person - and myself. Everything will be fine. Everything will be fine..except it's not fine and it won't be in a long time. I know some say it's just a phase which will end or that it gets better with time. But face it, it doesn't. You never learn to literally move on. You just learn to live with it. Or to ignore that feeling when you see someone you love with someone else. Ignorance sometimes is healthy.

Afterall, how many past lovers have crossed paths with each other with their new significant other without feeling a pang of jealousy? If they haven't, they are either lying or they have never been in love. It's simple. Now I just need to live with the fact that I will not be his girlfriend for long and that he can like or even love someone else. If someone asked me if I loved anyone a few years back, I would have surely said no. Love. A four letter word which carries so much weight. Some say teenagers confuse infatuation with love. But infatuation lasts for maximum four months, not years. Some times it is okay to admit that you have actually loved someone. Now I can say I have been in love. Loving someone irrationally and unconditionally, without a reason. Love is unreasonable too, as idiotic it sounds.

I wiped off my tears and swallowed back my sobs. Yes, I will live with it. What other options do I have? I can distract myself and love him silently. Love is heartbreakingly beautiful and I will just appreciate the fact that I am capable of loving. And hopefully one day, I will be able to love someone as much or maybe even more.

"Just take care, okay," the voice continued. I was surprised she was still here. Maybe she understood that even if a person says they are fine, they are not. Maybe she knows the pain. "My name is Evangaline and you can talk to me whenever you want to."

My jaw dropped. Naturally I am angry. I am angry of not being her. But I cannot despise her. I am sure that she doesn't have any idea of the things going on. She just joined our school and she doesn't deserve to worry about my mess.

"E - Evangaline?" I stepped out. Looking at her for the first time. She had glorious dark curls, with matched with her complexion beautifully. She was tall and slender. Her athletic built harmonized with her sharp features. She looked so proper - until I saw her eyes. Swollen just like mine.

"Tiahli?" Her full lips parted ways.

I nodded, managing a weak smile. "Guess you have heard about me?"

She looked down on the floor and raked her lower lip. "Yeah, a friend told me about you.."

I arched a brow.

"Nina," she quickly added. "It was her."

"I didn't question," I managed to smile. "Sooo.." I continued stepping towards the mirror beside her and running my fingers through my messy hair, "how are you?"

"Okay - " She looked up at me, "and you?"

My arms fell beside me. "Well... you can see."

"Mind sharing?" I guess she was just trying to be nice but right now, I really didn't need her kindness.

"Maybe some other time," I smiled.

"Oh. Okay. Well I don't know what has happened but if you need someone to just listen to you and soak up everything like a sponge, I am always here." She knew exactly what I needed. Someone who just listened without telling me their opinions. I guess she needed that someone some time too.

Evangeline left the convenience before I allowed some tears to fall so she didn't know what happened and why it happened. I can't blame her for anything. Afterall it was me who always emphasized on mine and Elijah's real relationship, in hope that someday he disagrees with me and wants it to be real. Guess this is why they say not to expect. I just became the creator of my own catastrophe.

That day, I left college early. I needed some time to gather myself and to come out strong for Elijah.

Ring ring. Ring ring.

The darkness had settled. It was nine at night when my phone rang. I answered it immediately.

"You left early." His voice was irritated, accusing or angry. I just couldn't put a finger on it.

"You noticed now." I replied in a similar time.

"I got worried." His tone softened. His voice calmed my soul.

"I was tired..err. .from the trip. Needed rest.." I hope he bought my lie. I waited for his reply.

"I need to talk to you," was his only reply. I waited for a few seconds before replying. I knew what he was going to say, but before he said anything, I wanted to tell him it's okay..

"But we are.."

"Come outside. I am waiting. " He ended our call.