Addict to a Bulletproof Heart

Be Concerned

TRIGGER WARNINGS! SO I'LL PUT *** ON THE PART WHERE IT ACTUALLY STARTS. THERE IS ALSO MENTIONS OF IT SO BEWARE.

P.O.V Josh

"I'm pretty sad that your emo ass fag and your retard emo brother didn't die. Next time it'll happen though."

I didn't know who it was from. But just reading this made me want to turn this living room into a lake. I couldn't stop crying. I should've listened to Tyler and them.

"Baby, it's alright. We will find who this is and probably beat their ass." Tyler comforted me. It still didn't calm me, though he was placing kisses on the hand he was holding. My left arm, which was my free arm, started stinging.

***

I know that feeling more than ever. I needed it. I begged for it. I favored it. I have to do it sometime. But I can't. Tyler will know. My brother will figure out.

I could just do it somewhere else.

My thighs.

I always wear skinny jeans, so I don't see why not. Except, I still didn't want to break anybody's trust. But, I craved the feeling. It called my name. I just couldn't do it right now.

"Whoever fucking did this will most likely die." Gerard growled. The person probably would die, considering it is Gerard you are dealing with. He's a damn bulldozer.

I look up to see Gerard's face, which is covered with something more than rage. It can't even be explained. It's just, I don't even know what to say at this point.

Frank is beyond pissed. He doesn't look like Gerard though. Frank and I have gotten close this past couple of weeks. He's a cool guys, who even helped me start my self defense training. He promised to have my back and I promised to have his. I can't say that I'm as strong as Gerard or Frank, but I'm getting there. I don't know about Tyler though. I just know he's stronger than me.

"Josh, you have any idea who did this." Frank sneered. I know it wasn't at me but I was kind of taken back by it. I haven't heard him this mad since I was in the hospital. To me, that's a long time.

"N-no... I d-don't." I somehow managed to choke out of my mouth. Tyler just lowered his head. I looked to him fully to see him... Crying?

I instantly cradled him. "Shh. Don't cry Tyjo. Please don't. I need you to be strong for me. Don't worry about it. We will get it all figured out." I confronted Tyler. His tense body seemed to relax and the feeling in my arm went away.

***

Tyler looks up finally. I don't hesitate to lock my lips with his. I feel his wet stained cheeks against mine. I pull away and just stare at him. A small smile creeps on my lips. How did I ever get Tyler?

"Thanks Josh." Tyler starts to wipe his tears off. I pull his hand away and I start to wipe them off for him. I can feel his cheeks hearing up more, which indicates that he's blushing. I giggle a little bit, and soon enough Tyler follows.

I have stopped crying at this point. I had no more tears left. They all came out all at once. I was pretty fucking tired too. "So what're gonna do?" I ask, gazing up to Gerard. He now has Frank in his arms and they are sitting on the couch. 

"We don't know yet, but whoever this person is will expect a visit." Gerard has managed to calm down, but his words made shivers go down my spine. I just nodded.

"For now, let's continue all the nice cards. If there are any rude fucking cards in there, then I won't let you see them." Gerard says. 

"Okay." I respond as Gerard and Frank move from the couch back onto the ground.

Soon enough we got done and the rest were really nice cards. It was about 5:30 and we already were hungry again. So here we are ordering another take out pizza. My mom really didn't mind, considering the fact she's been at the hospital all day.

"Damn this is good." I groan in pleasure of the mouth watering pizza enters my mouth. I just made it that descriptive, because it's so damn good. 

"Fuck yes it is." Frank agrees. His eyes are closed and he's just smiling while chewing. That makes one of us. I can't help but laugh and soon enough we are all choking on our pizzas.

"H-help!" Frank yells, but I'd still laughing. I managed to finally swallow my pizza. I didn't want to spit it out for one reason.

Spitters are quitters.

However; Tyler spit it out and I made fun of him for that. He just kept flushing as he lowered his head. I picked up his chin and gave him a nice kiss. We both savors that kiss. Mostly because of the pizza taste on our lips.

I can't blame us though.

"So you guys wanna stay the night? My mom won't care." I asked, looking up. 

"Yeah sure." They all agreed. I didn't want to sleep in my room or the living room. 

"We can sleep in the basement." I suggested. They just nodded their heads and I lead them to the basement. Well, not Gee. He already knew where it was.

I forgot that I had my new drum set down here. Tyler didn't really know about it. Well, he had an idea of me playing the drums, but he's never heard me. "Josh! You have a drum set?" Tyler exclaimed. My anxiety picked up. 

"Uh yeah,s-sure." I nodded my head weakly and made my way over to the drums. 

"Jishwa, you don't have to do it if you don't want to." Just Tyler calling me that made my whole body go numb. 

"It's fine. I want to play for you." I assured Tyler with a smile.

I just decided to play Dead, since it's the song that I knew most. I just asked them to play the song, but not to the point where I can't hear myself. I had this huge ass stereo in my basement that got little or no use, so after about a few months of no use, it finally got some attention.

I was doing pretty good so far, but I don't want to jinx it. I could see the plastered smile on Tyler's face as I continued drumming. At one point Gerard started singing. So did Tyler, but that didn't really last long since he couldn't stop smiling.

I finally finished the song and Tyler crushed me into a hug. "That was amazing babe!" He squealed. I just blushed and he pulled me into a kiss. I decided to deepen it too. I heard some pretty awkward coughs after that and me and Tyler smiled into our kiss, causing our teeth to collide.

And before I knew it we were all watching a movie and I was finally taken by sleep.