Catch Me, If You Can.

Entry 13

"God only gives his toughest battles to his strongest warriors."

Hello again! My, oh my, it's been a while. I have missed you guys so much and I'm happy to be back. And with my return, I have a story and some deeply wise and humble advice, along with some laughs because I hardly ever take things seriously. We're gonna jump right in!

Exactly one month ago, on July 3rd, 2016, I was in a jet ski crash while visiting some family on vacation. I was cut off by a speeding boat, got caught in the wake, and caused the ski to jerk and throw my little sister and myself off. My little sister, by the way, is perfectly fine and walked (or swam, I guess) away from the accident with only some abdominal pain. 

I, on the other hand, was not as lucky. As it turns out, I had hit my face with the steering wheel of the jet ski, and my sister hit me as well, adding double the force on the impact. It had happened so quickly that I do not remember crashing and hitting the water, I couldn't tell you what exactly went down during those few seconds. I rose from the water (my sister and I were wearing life vests, thank goodness), and I didn't feel anything. It was a numbness like no other; as if I was in so much pain that my brain couldn't process it. Blood was pouring out of my mouth and around me in the water, and I didn't fully come to until some nearby boaters who witnessed the accident helped my sister get me to safety.

It sort of went downhill from there. The pain set in, and after a half hour boat ride to an ambulance, I was in a hospital room with a bunch of loving family members and friends around me as the news was broken.

Two breaks in my jaw, a fracture in my left cheek, a sinus fracture, and possibly a missing tooth.

While I fortunately did not lose anything teeth, I was hospitalized from July 3rd to the morning of the 6th, where I waited two days in various pains and discomfort to get surgery. The surgery repaired my jaw and it was swift and perfect. However, I also faced even harsher consequences.

My jaw was wired completely shut. I could not open my mouth at all, which meant limited talking, v e r y limited eating, and a lot of frustration. I had to consume everything from a straw, and had to pack my own meals wherever I went to ensure I could actually eat. My blender had become attached to my hip, and maintaining weight and nutrients was a constant worry. It was hard to talk, I couldn't move my mouth without getting sore or tired, and everyone I encountered could not understand why I couldn't move my mouth. I was going insane without it. I could barely do anything besides sit and try to talk and try to eat, and I was so close to cutting these babies out myself. It was such a necessary evil; I needed to heal and get better but I was being tortured at the same time.

4 weeks. That's how long I went without moving my mouth. 4 weeks of slurred talking, milkshakes, and a liquid diet. Of frustration, annoyance, and agony. God only gives us tests he knows we can pass, but it always challenges us so we may become better people in the end.

Yesterday, August 2nd, was when I finally reached the light at the end of the tunnel to this journey. I went to the doctors, where they decided it was okay to cut out the wires that held my mouth together, that trapped me from so much. I can't describe the feeling of opening my mouth for the first time in a month; feeling the air rush in and the smooth sound of my voice nearly brought me to tears. I was free of the torture.

Unfortunately, this whole ordeal isn't quite over yet. I can only have soft foods for the next two weeks, and I still have metal braces-like bars covering my top and bottom teeth. But, of course, I'm not taking what I have for granted. I've eaten A TON of food these past two days, talked my ass off, and take every opportunity I get to smile, which is literally all the time. It's been absolutely terrible and I am now terrified of jet skis and boats, but it's made me stronger.

You can try to shut me up all you want, I won't ever be silenced.