Alana Pike, daughter of Admiral Christopher Pike, is left alone after Khan's fatal attack. Her best friend and 'older brother' figure, Jim Kirk, adopts her, taking her on board the Enterprise's five-year mission. On its first mission to Exaltron 8...
"Oh, no. Jim's not dying on me!" I exclaim. Quickly racking my brain, I wonder what I should beam down as. A goddess? Sure! Why not? This species will believe it... probably? Especially if I look way different, yet similar.
I have the same physical body structure (like head, two arms, two legs, etc.) as the people down there, except I'm white/tan/that may have sounded racist, oops... Maybe this could be their new perfection standard?
HA!
No.
Hmm... what do we believe mythical creatures are like? Maybe a fairy. Wings! Too bad I can't fly... but hey, they'd look awesome. If they ask me to fly, I'll be like, How dare you ask the goddess to prove herself! You will be doomed unless you free the hostages. *fires phaser into the crops* BOW DOWN TO QUEEN ALANA!
"Uhura, contact wardrobe department. Tell them Candice Swanepoel, Victoria's Secret 2014 Gilded Angel wings, gold sandals, and white strapless dress! Pronto!" I jump out of The Chair and run into the turbo lift. "Millard, with me. Chekov, you have the bridge."
"Captain?" a random woman ask. "Lieutenant Naya Jones. How do you know so much about Victoria's Secret?"
"Two words- Jim Kirk."
"...Aye, captain." Chekov looks surprised. Who else am I supposed to put in charge? I don't think Uhura would want to be captain... would she?
I never thought those countless days of watching skinny girls walk down a strip of metal in their underwear with Jim would pay off. It was boring and weird. The only good part was the singing. But well, I guess it had its uses.
The only reason I remember the name Candice Swanepoel is because a) she's one of Jim's favorites and b) Jim said she looked like me. I can see the resemblance. Now I'm a blonde, which made it even more so. I'm 5'8, which is probably a few inches shorter than her. Models are all like... taller than Jim and stuff.
Sadly, she is dead.
My plan is to pop down there looking like a goddess. If they question me, STUN THEM. I'll get Sulu and Millard to control the weather by making a breeze with a shuttle. And my phaser will be my lightning bolt. They've never had the "goddess Alana" come down from the heavens. NOW SHE WILL.
Screw the prime directive. Jim's already kinda broken it by becoming a god. My phaser will show them to mess with the one and only Alana Pike!
"Where are we going, Ala- er, captain?" Amber asks.
"Alana's fine. We're going to convince them I'm a goddess, and you and Sulu will be piloting the shuttle!" I exclaim. "You guys can make wind with it, right?"
"Yes, I think," Amber replies.
"Good. BONES!" I exclaim, entering the medbay. "We need Sulu. Captain's orders."
"What the hell do you think you're doing?" Bones asks.
"Saving Jim's butt!" I snap, running over to Nurse Chapel and Sulu. "Sorry to interrupt, but I need Sulu back. Is he clear?"
"Cleared," Nurse Chapel answers, giving me a look that said, what?
"But you're not!" Bones exclaims, grabbing me by the arm. "Look, I told Jim that I'd keep an eye on you."
I smile. "You can. Simply watch me on the view screen."
"Dammit, Alana, are you out of your starship-flying mind?" Bones asked.
You know Bones is calling you crazy when he uses your heritage to insult you. (Jim said Bones asked if he was out of his "corn-fed mind" once. And I heard that he asked if Spock was out of his Vulcan mind. Who knows what he said anywhere else?"
I roll my eyes. "One, yes, I was raised on starships, but I never flew one. Two, I know it's breaking the prime directive. I'm going to take responsibility for it. I know they'll let me off because I acted under traumatic circumstances."
Traumatic circumstances meaning my freaking family is dead and Jim is like my big brother. I've been "emotionally compromised." AKA, I'm disregarding the prime directive, and they can't press charges. I learned that one from Spock.
"I'm not going to let you," Bones replies calmly.
"Bones, as your current captain, I order you." I stare into his eyes, dead serious.
"And as the chief medical officer, I say no," Bones snaps. Sadly, he does have the power to do that.
"Then you condemn Jim to death." A tear rolls down my cheek. Fake crying. "I can save him, Bones. Aren't doctors all for saving people? Be a doctor and let me save him..."
Hopefully that punches him in the feels. If I could work Joanna into this- nah, that's rude.
"What if it doesn't work?" Bones asks, grabbing both of my arms softly, his tone also softening. "And you make a mistake?"
"I'll have to take the risk. I have a chance." I sigh. "Every second I spend arguing here is one less second down there convincing them. Can I go or not?"
Finally, Bones lets go of my shoulders. "Fine."
"Come on, Sulu, Millard. We're going on a trip in our favorite rocket ship! Zooming through the sky!" I exclaim, grabbing Sulu and Millard before they could speak. They were probably still stunned I beat Bones in an argument. I did play the guilt card...
In the turbolift, I quickly explain the plan. The I quickly change after leaving the two on in turbolift (Thank God the wardrobe department on this ship was amazing) and then headed to the transporter room. Sulu and Millard had already taken the shuttle and were off to the planet's surface.
"Pike? Who's in command?" Scotty asks.
"Captain Chekov," I answer. "I'm going to the surface. Put me on a pedestal."
Scotty sighs, and I assume he's going to give me a lecture, but his reply surprises me. "Good luck, Captain Pike."
"Thanks," I reply.
"Chekov to transporter room."
"Scott here."
"I think ze keptin may be next. Spock, him and a female lieutenant remain... ze others are gone..."
"Energize."
I've always wanted to say that. The captain gets to say it, beaming down, and I've never gone on an away mission like this. But it's also a rescue mission.
And with that, I disappear in a golden swirl of light. And the last thing I see is Scotty laughing at me, because a 14 year old as captain may not be the best idea.
You know the "out of your starship flying mind? well I couldn't remember where this tumblr post that inspired it was, but here it is:
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