Rise Up Women Of God!

Chapter Seven

Chapter Seven

ROSE

Cheryl stops by Mimi's and invites me to come and join her for a ladies meeting next Thursday. I want to say no but she looks hopeful. I give in and say ok. She jumps up and down and claps her hands making me laugh.

"Thank you so much. I am so excited that you will be joining us."

"Yeah sure. No problem."

"I can pick you for the meeting." She says.

"Ok."

I live close to the church but seeing how she is so sweet I just agree. I don't know how to tell her I am not like her. I don't believe. Oh what the hell I might as well now that I said I would anyway.

Once I am home I start supper and talk to the kids. Mathew excitedly tells me about Marcia his new tutor. I think he has a crush. I check that they have completed their home work and then allow them to watch TV. I go back into the kitchen.

I think just how much my life has turned around. God bless Carol. Yes you heard me right. She believes in him so he might as well bless her. I haven't been in touch with Dillon. I do wonder where he is and what he is doing. I wonder if he sorry for what he did? I mean how could he possibly think that beating two young boys and trying to molest an eight year old girl is ok? I just don't understand what must go through your mind for you to end doing those kind of things. He is no better than Chris in my books. I am glad he is out of my life.

Later that night Micah comes into my room and asks if can sleep next to me. I let her.

"Mama."

"Yes baby."

"Why don't we pray when we get up and when we go to bed like Katie and her family?"

Now how do I answer her? I don't want to take away her belief. I also don't want to give her false hope.

"Would you like to pray?"

"Yes please mama."

"Ok. Let us close our eyes and you pray."

"As we lay me down to sleep, I pray the Lord our souls to keep. May angels watch us through the night and wake with us in the morning light. God please watch over Matt and Mark too. Amen."

"That was beautiful baby. Where did you learn that?"

"Katie taught it to me."

"Good night baby girl."

"Good night mama." She says and then reaches up and kisses my cheeks.

It seems that everywhere I turn he is there. Like he is trying to say you may not believe in me but I am here. I hear you God. I am just not sure I am ready to talk to you yet. I know some day we will have to have this conversation but that time is not now.

I don't dose off instead I think back to happier times when I used to love the Lord and when I used sing. I was young and vibrant. When my mother and I use to pray we would sing. Every time we sang we felt his presence. We felt the peace. I used write music and just sing. How my soul rejoiced in him. That was such a long time ago.

As I sleep I dream of my mother and how happy we were before Chris. Then the dream turns ugly reminding me of how he killed her. When I awaken I remember why I can't trust this God.

Thursday the day of the meeting...

As promised Cheryl picks me up. I admire her. She is so beautiful with her long red hair and emerald green eyes. She is of average height and has a good figure. She is simple never over the top. You would think a beauty like her would want to shine. You know how we women can be at times, fighting for attention but this women can silence a room with her good looks and she doesn't even have to dress up slutty.