Chapter 1: Connor

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Sometimes, you feel like the world will crash down on you, but really, you're just a speck. And nothing more. Nothing revolves around you, just the feelings you hold, and they are dangerous to be alone with. So learn to kill your emotions, or have the power to face them. But no matter what, you'll always be small, in the little world, that is your mind.

1962-

Connor Jet Murphy, the eldest son of Lilith, and Larry Murphy, and older sibling to his 2 sisters and 5 brothers. Lilith was not his original Mother, but after Cynthia passed away while having his sister Zoe, his father remarried. A star student in his small Mormon school, and a artistic prodigy. He was never one to disappoint his parents, but there's a first time for everything.

Connor had been on his Mother and Father's heels about this since he was eighteen years of age. He had dreamed of joining the army since he saw a poster of the famous Uncle Sam hanging outside the small neighborhood's only grocery store. It was just after church had ended, his mother and sisters ran into the store to pick up a few things for dinner.

Connor never liked waiting outside, being forced to hold his younger brother Pete's sweaty little hand. The child tugging and whining at him but that day was different, all cliches aside. His attention was drawn to the large red, white and blue poster plastered along the brick wall of the building. It read, "I want YOU for the U.S. army." It's not like he hadn't seen it before, the subject of the war was everywhere these days, on your t.v., in your stores, even in school. 'Russia declares war on U.S. winter, January 1st, 1968 U.S. drops bombs on Eastern Russia, autumn, September 12th, 1968.

Time in between declaration and bombing known as the brewing period, temperatures run high on both sides— he has heard it all plenty of times. But it was something about today, the way the southern sunshine beat down on him, the thick air, and his brother's hand, that it finally hit him. This life he had, it wasn't what he wanted, in fact, this was the opposite of what he wanted. But this poster, this poster he saw wrinkled at the sides, on this hot summer day, spoke levels to him, the life the poster promised was his escape.

~~~
World war three broke out in the late sixties, the cold war finally being tipped by America bombing western Russia. The war continues with Britain, France, and most of South America siding with the U.S. The U.S.S.R. ( Russia ) pushes against and retaliate with bombing Alaska and invading Hawaii. Now it is the early seventies and all young American boys are at the edge of their seat joining the army left and right, hearing stories from their fathers about WWII.
But not all of them join for the honor of being a solider.
~~~

1968-

That was years ago, but the dream was still seeped into his bones.
So he went, and the walk home from the recruiting station was probably the most terrifying moment in his life. It's not like he hasn't been nagging his parents about it for about three years now but, he's actually done it, and there is no going back.

His parents have stopped taking him seriously two years ago, he was an elder now in the church, there was no way he'd defy the mormon religion in such a way. Connor felt his hands quiver, but simply combed the hand through his already growing hair. His step-mother practically begged him to cut it down, saying it made him look like a hippie. Purely out of spite for the women did he grow out his hair even longer.

And after thinking throughout his ideals. Maybe he is joining the army despite his parents wants, as a form of rebellion. Defying everything he knew.

And he had. And that choice, might just be the death of him.

The papers were as heavy as lead in his pocket, but also were his ticket free from here. He didn't want to leave his faith behind, he was a God fearing man. It was the church he had a problem with. Connor had grown up in an area where behind every blade of grass there was a bible, a cross, an old man ready to read you scripture, and that wasn't for him. That was a life he wasn't willing to live.

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