Bittersweet

Come save me

I didn't know what time it was.
I didn't really care to be honest

All that I cared about was the soft, cold wind hitting my arms and Frank who was currently sitting on my lap running his hands softly through my hair whilst kissing me slowly
I still couldn't get over the fact that this was so different to all the other times Frank and I were together.
He wasn't insulting me, wasn't hurting me in any way.
This was actually really nice.

I was really enjoying this.
Actually I enjoyed this way too much
The feeling in my stomache wouldn't go away and the way Frank kissed me slowly, almost in a caring way and held my face in his hands in a protective gesture made me interpret way too much into this whole situation.

I always had to remember myself that this was Frank Iero and Frank Iero didn't do feelings.
Hell, this whole thing tonight was so... Not Frank At all...

But Right here, right now I couldn't care less.
Not one single thought could stop me from taking everything Frank would give me in that moment
And if a caring kiss was all I could ever get... Then I could live with that

I wasn't really made for asking for more.

*12 years ago*

"You're going to apologise. Right about now!", my mother yelled holding up a book covered in black leather

"B-But it was an accident I-I didn't do it on purpose", I tried to defend myself only to get hit with the bible in my mother's hands
It didn't really hurt, I was already used to the dull ache it left.

"I don't care. You threw the book of our lord on the ground, so you have to apologise", she pointed over to the small cabin in the corner of the living room.
On top of the wood was a big, brown cross with a clay figure of Jesus in the middle

"Apologise for offending God", she hissed, grabbing my forearm, pushing her long fingernails painfully deep into my soft skin 

"Ow you're... you're hurting me, mama", I hissed trying to wiggle myself out of her grip only making her pull me harder towards the cross

"That's gods punishment! And now apologise!"

I couldn't understand my mother. How could somebody put their religious belief before their child's well being?
I didn't do anything wrong
And I sure as hell wasn't going to apologise for it

It hurt but after I tugged a few times, my mother lost the grip on my arm, leaving deep red marks on my pale skin.
"I'm not going to fucking apologise", I said as calm as possible, knowing that she'd get even more angry when I screamed at her. 

"You will", she insisted trying to grab my arm again but I could avoid it fast enough

"No I won't. Sorry mama but I won't do this. I have somewhere to go now, I'll see you later", I said and was just about to turn around and leave the house when my mother started screaming for real this time

"You little, sinning brat", she shouted and I faced her again, "you're going to hell"