Hold On

There With You

*Natalie's POV*

Sebastian was just, standing there, in front of me, a somewhat concerned look on his face, but also a hint of... something else. I couldn't read him too well in the moment, after I'd caught him crying. Was he emotional over me? I didn't know if I was ready for this...

"Hey. Can I walk you home?" I nodded my agreement and zipped my jacket up as we headed out the door, Eileen gave me an odd look, I knew she'd recognized Sebastian earlier, but I had quietly asked her not to say anything "Do you have any plans for dinner tonight doll?" I shook my head as we walked down the fairly busy sidewalk. I normally walked alone, headphones in so I could tune everything out, ignore anyone that may look my way... Sebastian stopped walking and gently took my hand and pulled me inside a little restaurant, and he walked us to a corner booth, letting me slide in first.

"I'm not really hungry..." I mumbled under my breath as I nervously glanced around the place. We had gotten a few stares when we walked in. I mean, Sebastian was an actor, of course we would have a hard time finding any sort of privacy in such a public place, but my anxiety was threatening to rise through the roof. He sensed that something was wrong and put his arm around my shoulder, pulling me as close to him as possible, instantly calming me down.

"Nat we aren't doing that again. I can hear your stomach growling..." I fidgeted with the napkins on the table, trying to give myself something to focus on "I'm sorry. I shouldn't try to control you..." He trailed off as the waitress walked up to our table "I'll take a coffee, and some blueberry pancakes. Natalie here, I'm not sure if she wants anything?"

"I'll just have the same thing..." I mumbled under my breath as I still played with the napkins on the table, my hands wouldn't stop shaking, even though I was comfortable around Sebastian, my nerves and emotions were on the verge of bubbling over. I closed my eyes, and took a few deep breaths, jumping a little when his hand took mine.

"It's alright Natalie, I'm right here." His voice was soft, enveloping my ears. He was so close to me, again, that I could feel his warm breath against my neck. Our quiet moment was interrupted by the arrival of our food, and I picked at mine, taking a few bites before setting my fork down on my plate "What's the matter doll?" Sebastian talked with a mouth full of food, mumbling a quick apology before swallowing and setting his fork down.

"There are a lot of people staring..." I sunk as low as I could into the booth, glancing around the restaurant at the many pairs of eyes that were trained upon the two of us. Sebastian motioned for a waitress to come over, quietly asking her to box up our food and helping me put my jacket on.
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"I'm sorry... about that." We were walking down the sidewalk, Sebastian's arm carefully wrapped around my back as we headed towards my apartment. He had insisted on walking me home, and I was grateful even though I'd argued with him for a good ten minutes before giving in "I have this, anxiety problem. I'm terrified of what people think of me, I build these walls to protect myself from being hurt. Jane..." My breath caught in my throat and we stopped walking for a moment, I spotted a bench in front of a store and I moved towards it. Sebastian sat down before me, pulling me down next to him, running his hand up and down my arm to warm me up as he waited for me to continue "... She was the only one that was ever able to break those walls down, the only one to ever truly know me. I miss her..." I trailed off, my hands fumbling with the ends of my jacket sleeves, picking at a few stray threads "I keep thinking that I'm going to check my phone, and find another message from her, something about her day, or one of her cheesy jokes, I can't seem to grasp the fact that she's really gone Sebastian." My eyes were tearing up, and I frantically wiped at them before standing up from the bench, and shakily holding my hand out to Sebastian "It's freezing out here... and we're almost back to my apartment..." He took my hand, a sad look crossing over his face as he glanced over mine.
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"Hot chocolate or coffee?!" I hollered from my small kitchen to Sebastian, who was sitting on my couch in the tv room, flipping through the channels.