The Babysitter

- 6 -

Trigger Warning: Once again, more talk of suicide and self harm, please don't read this if it's triggering to you. Please stay safe m'loves <3

(Dallon's POV)

"I- it's a long story." I stutter.

"Dallon, I've got time. Please, I need you to tell me."

"I can't I'll cry." I refuse

"Dallon, cry all you fucking want. I don't care. I need you to tell me. I need to know how to help you."

"Okay, so here it goes. Remember Kyle? My uh... boyfriend?"

Brendon nods. "Yeah."

Well, one night, we we're supposed to have a date, but he never showed up. He stopped answering my calls, and I was just so mad. Well, about a week later, the school had announced that he was dead... he, killed himself." I practically had to spit out those last few words.

Brendon rested his hand on my shoulder and placed his head in the crook of my neck, causing a tingling sensation.

"Well, after that, I had no one to talk to, or should I say, I didn't want to talk to anyone, anymore. You're sister tried so hard to get me to talk to her, but I just couldn't do it." I sigh.

"It got really bad. I wound up... well, taking a bunch of pills... the whole bottle actually. I- I just wanted to end it all right then and there. Luckily, my brother was home, and he heard me drop to the floor. He gagged me and, he saved my life."

I was tearing up.

"My family didn't know, I was always able to put on a happy face while I was around them. This was all such a shock. It sucks that they had to hear the news the way they did, with me, laying in a hospital bed, connected to a bunch of machines, holding on for dear life. To my surprise, they we're extremely okay with it. But you know, I still wasn't okay, I was depressed, so I had to be placed in a mental institution. My parents thought it would be best to leave my past behind me, and start a new future, so we moved back to Salt Lake."

I tried so hard to hold back the tears, but I couldn't do it anymore.

"But you know, life seems to love to throw shit my way. Memories kept haunting me. I couldn't think of any better way to handle my emotions other than... cutting myself." I cried out

I then began to uncontrollably sob.

"I'm such a fucking failure! I'm working as a goddamn waiter right now and right now that looks like it's going to be my career. I just can't see the point of living anymore. Nobody loves me, nobody cares about me. I'm just going to live a sad and pathetic life. What is the point?! How could anyone love-"

I was cut off by Brendon... kissing me? I was completely caught off guard.

I started to kiss back, who was I to turn down any sort of affection?

I think that scared him off, because he immediately broke off from the kiss.

"Shit! What did I just do?"

"Brendon It's okay!" I say as I put my hand on his shoulder, trying to calm him down.

"No it's not fucking okay! I have a girlfriend! And I'm straight! What am I going to do?"

"Brendon, calm down, you were just trying to comfort me, this doesn't make you gay. I won't tell anyone okay. I promise."

I think that calmed him down. He jumped back onto the bed face first, and let out a muffled scream into his pillow.

"Well, this was a weird night." He says

"Yeah, something like that."

"Dallon, you need to know that you do have people who love you, I'll always be here for you, and so will Kara, heck, even my parent's love you! You are loved, you are not a failure. I'm so sorry all that had to happen to you. You're such a great guy, you didn't deserve that."

"I just, don't know how to do it. How do people handle it?"

I hear a knock at the door. "Who is it?" Brendon shouts

"It's Kara, can I come in?"

He looks over at me for my approval. I nod.

"Yeah!" he yells.

"Are you guys okay?"

"I think Dallon needs our support right now." Brendon explains.

Kara comes over and hugs me. "Dallon, you know I love you no matter what. Right? There's nothing you could do to change that."

"Yeah! Don't ever be afraid to tell us what's going on." Brendon adds.

"It's getting late, you're welcome to spend the night." Kara says.

"I appreciate the offer but I've got work in the morning, is there anyway I could get a ride home from either of you?" I say.

"Sorry did that sound like an offer? My bad. You're staying the night, you are not in the right place to be left alone! I'll take you to work in the morning, but there's no way I'm leaving you at a time like this!" Kara demands.

I see brendon shrug with a small smile on his face. Kara always gets her way so there's no reason to fight it.

"Fine, but where will I sleep?" I ask, giving in.

"You can sleep with me! I mean... In my room... Fuck you know what I meant." Brendon stutters. I couldn't help but laugh, Kara too.

"Brendon, got something on your mind there?" Kara asks with a laugh.

"Are you sure? I can sleep on the couch if it makes you uncomfortable." I offer.

"No you're fine! I'm not uncomfortable at all!" Brendon says, clearly uncomfortable. But there's honestly no point in fighting him on it, he's clearly not going to budge.

"Alright if you insist!" I answer in agreement.

"I'll go get you some blankets and pillows. What time do you have to be at work?" Kara asks.

"Before nine. And I can't be late, I've already had my first offense, I can't get another."

"Alright, just wake me up and I'll take you." She says before she leaves.

I look over at Brendon's bed, it's only a twin.

"I can sleep on the floor if you want." Brendon kindly offers. "No no no, you've got school tomorrow you need your sleep, and don't argue with me." I deny, aggressively. They've done enough for me already I can't let them give up their lives for me. I'm not worth it.