The filler

1]Over to the dark side

3 months later.

What do you think ?

What will it feel like - being alone -not physically but mentally. Knowing that there is on one to catch you when you fall back ? 
Not knowing who to go to when you need help ?
Not knowing what to do when it feels like your heart has been stabbed with a rusted knife .

Well, I'll tell you what it feels like - better yet-what it tastes like.

Metallic and salty .

Exactly like blood and betrayal .

Well I'm changing-
I'm stronger
I'm braver
Reckless
Selfish
Unstoppable .

When you taste the metallic and salty -blood and betrayal - it slowly lessens ,it goes away . What doesn't go -is the after taste . Do you know what the after taste to it is?

~+~

I let my hand brush through the countless outfits that hung in the cupboard. Over the sharp sequins and glitter, over the soft pastel and sundresses, over everything else that didn't really belong to me. It belonged to who they wanted me to be.

From following the most popular to following the most athletic- I had seen it all- I had been it all. I knew my school, I knew the people -I knew their weaknesses and their strengths. And so I was dangerous.

Today, I chose what I wanted to wear. Who I wanted to be. I continued to trail my hand over the various fabrics to land on charcoal skinny jeans and a maroon V neck T-shirt. I topped it with a half fake leather jacket.

They were clothes of a rebel, and outcast - but not by society,but by choice. At Excalibur high, home to the knights-being original was wrong.

But to me it wasn't.

~+~
The good girl.
We all have a few of those in our schools don't we? In Excalibur high we have only one-
Cora Ellen .
Cora Ellen is the perfect good girl , she follows and shows her stereotype so well -it feels like it's all pretend. Wrapped up in her own world, jut playing the role that society had handed out.

Perfect grades?
Check.
Sweet and optimistic?
Oh yeah.
Has and is Never going to be into sports?
Obviously .
Will she ever be caught in anything remotely girly like a dress?
Never.

Cora Ellen is also the only girl that never used me. Ever.
She gives me hope- to be able to trust someone again. But not now -not anytime soon.

Mission-break her stereotype,gain her trust and bring her over to the dark side.

Break the stereotype of someone who defined their stereotype. This is not insane at all.

~+~
Endless sounds and various conversations burned through my ears as I walked into the cafeteria. I entered long before the rush would start ,so I wouldn't trip and fall on my face - atleast one person does every day.

I was generally ignored by my fellow peers -I had nothing special about my self . I was average height with dark red-almost brown hair that reaches half way down my back and brown eyes. And that was what I did wrong. I wasn't super beautiful enough to be a popular. I wasn't smart enough to be a nerd. I wasn't  reckless enough to be the bad girl and I wasn't athletic enough to be on the track team. I was average. And that was why I was a filler.