MY RANTS AND ISSUES

TOILET PROBLEMS!!!

Hey everyone how you doing?? Good. No... Then how about shitty cause I've something shitty to share with you about my problems with FUCKING toilets.

You've been on it and done God knows whatever and unfortunately there's no paper. I find this really fucking stupid I mean if you've taken a big shit and all the papers gone is there not some side of you that says...

"Hmm fuck me I've done a shit the size of China!! Had to use all the paper as well.... Wait what happens if someone else comes in and takes a shit the size of Russia??"

Common sense should tell you to replace it.

BUT NO not in my house or in any other public cubical. I'm not even over exaggerating. I remember I was in a clothes shop and while taking a shit I forgot to check for paper and with shitty luck on my side there wasn't any!!

"So what did you do mate?" Had to shout over the next cubicle. "Hey sorry man but could you kindly spend me half of your toilet roll because I've taken a huge shit and some genius forgot to replace the paper!!"

Ok it wasn't exactly like that but pretty similar and luckily for me the guy was nice enough to do so. And has this happened to me once? LOL NO I'd say it's happened 56 times to be exact!

Anyway now that that is sorted my next problem with toilets is privacy. NOT GOOD ENOUGH

I remember I think it was 2009 I was at some music concert and of course after eating too much food and drink (not alcohol I was under 18) caused my bladder to panic so I went to one of those cubicle things and as I went in there was already a problem cause the floor was covered in sweet wrappings and piss. The second thing was the lock. It was showing green so I knew it was unlocked so I switched it to red but for some god only knows reason it only locked itself half way.

How's that possible?? Shut up I don't know!! Anyway I just did what you normally do in the toilet when suddenly the so called locked door swung open to a women who looked in her 30's staring at a 10 year old me with my pants down dick out pissing.

She screamed and slammed the door. For the rest of the day my face had gone red with embarrassment.

So after my wonderful life story this is kind of why I hate public toilet cubicles. Some of you will laugh but honestly it still pisses me off. So what I'd like to clear up is

1. Don't automatically sit on the shitter cause there'll probably be no paper. Check before.
2. Even if the door says locked check it, you don't want what happened to me become reality.
3. Make sure the grounds not covered in piss, your shoes will smell real bad.

Well I think that's about it I know this chapters a bit shitty hence the pun so I'll seeya in the next chapter
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